I was thinking this morning on my way to work, rather than just singing along with the music and damning the signals that slowed me down. (I had the latest Norah Jones in the deck, and I'm telling you, I just cannot get into it! Too country sounding. It's kind of disappointing...)
Anyway, I realized that sincerity is a good thing...but when delivered with a mix of anger and annoyance, it's very hard for a person to detect. You can have the best of intentions in attempting to express your feelings about something to another person, and you might sincerely feel them, too. But if you sound mad and cold while saying how you feel, chances are, a person might not recognize what you're saying as being all that real.
Tone is important, my friends...I should know. All I have to do is put a smiley into an e-mail that I've written while filled with spite and anger to a co-worker who's pissing me off, and they have no idea that I'm mad at them. If I omit the smiley, I inevitably get a note back saying, "I didn't mean to make you mad!" (I hate the defensive response...especially in the work place. Just fucking move on and do what I'm asking, please!)
Just the random thoughts that are going through my brain this morning. I shopped till I dropped last night, and found a new dress for the wedding on Saturday. Now I can confidently get dressed on my own, thank you very much! I do feel bad that I responded that two people would be attending, but as my friend told me, "Things happen, Faith! Don't worry about it..." So I'm not gonna anymore. I don't like the girl that's getting married all that much, anyway. But loads of friends will be there that I haven't seen in a while, so I'm still very glad she invited me.
The shopping helped me feel much better, too. It's amazing what it does for me when I'm in as dismal a mood as I was yesterday. Shop girls were friendly, but not too friendly (you know, like when they follow you around, and constantly ask if they can help, even though you've told them you're fine over and over? I hate that shit...), and they simply unloaded my arms of the dresses and blouses I'd found to try on at regular intervals so that I could shop unencumbered, which is always very pleasant. I'm happy with my purchases, and will be able to take back the original dress I'd ordered for the wedding to the actual store, although I'm sort of pissed that I paid the extra shipping fee to make sure it got here in time. C'est la vie!
I've also decided to attend the blogger meet-up tonight, despite the discomfort that might be encountered. I want to meet some people, and I want to have a drink and relax and be chit-chatty and have fun. I'm really hoping I won't have to try too hard to do that...(not that the company won't allow me to...rather that my feelings and head might become too overinvolved in the evening, is all...and I don't want that. Not in the least!)
So, happy Thursday! Work is a-callin'...