Thursday, December 23, 2004

Home again, home again, jiggity jig.

Well, I made it safely to my dad's house once again. The Twin and I shopped all day yesterday, and picked up many of the remaining items I needed in order to have a happy Christmas here at the ranch. I'm up early, of course, because jet lag sucks, and my little nieces suck even more. (Which is really not true. They don't suck...they just stink a little for waking up as early as they do, and for playing in the space that's right outside my bedroom, is all. Buggars...)

I had some work to do really quick anyway, so I don't mind. Besides, I went to sleep last night at 8:45. Um, can we say "old lady"? I mean, WTF is up with that??? I don't want to get sick, though, so when my body tells me it's that tired, I listen, dammit.

Dave took me to the airport yesterday, as promised. He was great about it, actually...he got to my house a little before 7, and then he loaded my bags into the car for me, and he even took them inside the airport for me when we got there! I don't know why I thought that was such a sweet gesture (even if I did think it was stupid for him to leave his car parked at the curb like that...the "police" at the airport just love to find suckers like him and pounce on them ASAP...), but it was really nice of him, and then he kissed me, and we said our goodbyes. I'm really hoping that he starts to get somewhat normal, and takes dating me a bit more seriously after the holidays are over.

I had a lot of time to think on my flight, and I am somewhat perplexed by my attraction to a person like Dave. I mean, yes, he's funny in his little way, and he's darned cute, dammit...but his strange behavior isn't all that attractive, and his hot/cold mentality towards me is so odd. So what is it? I think it's his financial security that makes me want him as I do. He's got his shit together, you know? He's owned his home for 20 years, so obviously that's just an asset to him now. He drives a reasonable car, but it's still a very nice car. He doesn't have to work, which is weird, but still very cool. I don't know. He kind of reminds me of Mr. Knightly in "Emma". Except without the creepy big brother vibe, and a little less of the charm. He's not necessarily a father-figure, because my dad would never behave like Dave does, so that's not an issue. Plus, he acts so immaturely a lot of the time that it's not like I look up to him to learn something from him.

I only worry about the fact that we're somewhat alike in our abbrasiveness, and I don't know how well it'd work if we actually were in a relationship. I know I can actually be very conciliatory when it comes to being in a relationship that I want to work, and while I act aggresively some of the time, I actually am in love with my friends, so to speak, and want to be happy around them as much as possible. I don't like being around people when I'm feeling grumpy, and it's kind of a crappy thing to do to expose people to the grump, unless you plan on trying to pull out of it, of course. But those days when you know that all you need is a good cry, a movie or two, and a pizza all to yourself are rather obvious to me, and I keep to myself when they happen. I get the feeling that Dave doesn't know how to do that too well. So I'm wondering if it'd be a source of conflict for us, or if it'd be something that could be solved with some regular lovin'. (Because I honestly think that's part of his problem, too...he wants it, thinks he can't get it, and he puts himself down when he thinks about it...I sincerely cannot understand why the man doesn't realize how adorable he is. *sigh!*)

Anyway, I'm done thinking about it for now...just needed to get that out there so I can focus my brain on the important things. Those are: What should I get my dad for Christmas? When will I be able to get together and hang out with Lyn? And what the hell am I gonna eat for breakfast? Because I'm STARVING!!

Lovely Christmas Eve Eve to you all...


lyn said...

oh joy. dave and the airport was nice. a gentleman, for sure.

and i can't wait to see you. we'll figure it out because you're not going to leave without seeing me, i promise!!!

FaithsTwin said...

**looking for old lady...looking for old lady...looking for ol- bumps into Twin-**

Oh, THERE you are! Ummm don't you think you're a little too old for that outfit?

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas, Faith!! :)

Keith said...

I've always found a bad mood can be easily defused by someone who you know will listen to you and let you detonate in their presence -- you know, being supportive without being patronizing. The problem with my last ex (okay, AMONG THE MANY problems with my last ex) was that she always sounded way too patronizing -- after I told her I didn't think she was listening to me when I was venting about stuff and that she was being way too self-centered, she became overly concerned to the point where it sounded fake. But it all boils down to... what's the use in being in a bad mood if other people don't know you're in a bad mood? :)

Hope you had a good Xmas.