Monday, December 13, 2004

I'm a worrier. So sue me.

I hate that I worry about shit that I should not worry about. Well, at least not as soon as I do. For example, next week, my co-worker and I have to travel to Wichita for a meeting in the early morning the day before we both have to leave town for the holiday. We don't mind, really. It's about a 3 and a half hour drive, I think, and it'll suck having to get up that early, but if we can be helpful by being there, then we're happy to do so. But here's the problem: my co-worker is a notoriously late person. Like, missed flights on a regular basis because she was running too late (and they were in the goddammed afternoon, even. Like at 3 p.m. And she couldn't get out of her house in time to catch the plane. Uh-huh.), and has made my old boss run late for meetings because they're driving there together, etc...The last time they drove someplace together, he told her to meet him in the parking lot here at the office at 6:30 a.m., and if she wasn't there, he was leaving without her. I think that worked, as I recall. The thing that freaks me out is that she wants to leave here at 6:30 to be at a 9 a.m. meeting in Wichita. I thought about that, and we'd have to be going super-sonic speed, which I'm just not comfortable with, really. I'm all for doing a max of 85 mph on the freeway, but anything above that is not cool with me. I want to leave no later than 5:30. (I really wish the meeting was at 10 or 11, but I digress...) And my plan is to tell her that I will be here at 5:30 a.m. ready to go, and if she isn't, then I'm leaving to head there on my own.

But why the fuck am I thinking about this a full week in advance of when it's actually taking place? I don't know! It's the retardation in my brain that makes me think of useless things that I can't do anything about far too much, and there's nothing I can do about it, really. I know I do it, I want to stop doing it, and I continue to do it. Meh.

Ok, so my weekend was a bit up and down. I went to bed late on both Friday and Saturday, and slept in until way late on both Saturday and Sunday. That was as it should be. Friday, I went directly to the Moose after work, and hung out with the friends I hadn't seen in a long time. Seems that Dave has moved on to an older blond that he's decided to try to torment. I've met her once before, and she's pretty...thin, big boobs, cute face. Kind of fried hair, but whatever. It doesn't detract from the total package, really, it seems. It does make me consider what my hair might look like in another 10 years if I keep bleaching it, but that's beyond the point. She's a really nice girl, and we sat next to each other and chatted about lots of things all evening. Dave left at about 7:30, in my estimation, and the chick stuck around (because that's how things work with don't know if you're supposed to go along with him when he leaves, or if you're just supposed to show up at his house later, or what. It sucks...), and we wound up getting invited over to a table of men who wanted us to "just have one drink with them". We thought, why the hell not? They were really nice, and wound up buying us more than just one drink. Dave's new chicky got a bit tipsy, IMO, and then started complaining of a toothache that looked pretty bad. It was around 10 or so by then, and I could see she was in pretty bad shape, so I asked her if she wanted a ride to Dave's, and she thought about it, but said she'd be fine, really. (She and I had talked about how he and I were fooling around before he moved on to her...I told her he didn't impress me much as a human being, and she actually agreed for the most part, but whatever...) So she left, and then I finished my drink, and paid my tab, and left soon after that.

When I went to the Moose on Saturday, no one was there yet, so I chatted with my bartender friend and pretty soon, Dave walked in. He sat around 3 chairs away from me on my left at the bar, which was odd. But he's an ass, so I didn't care. I asked him if his new chick was doing ok. He said, "I don't know. How should I know?" And I told him that I thought she had planned on going over to his house the night before, because she left the bar in a rather tipsy state, and she had a horrible toothache. I even called his house to warn him to watch for her...did he not get my message? He just sort of was looking at me with his big, dumb look on his face, and then I said, "Well, didn't she go to your house?" And he said, "She may have, she may not have." I just looked at him with my best are-you-just-a-TOTAL-idiot? look on my face, and then I said, "Well, I hope she's ok...she looked like the pain was pretty bad last night..." and I turned the other way from him, and then the guy to the right of me at the bar started talking to me, and I ignored Dave the rest of the time. He's so, so grumpy and just plain nasty for no reason. You know, I don't know why he even ever started talking to me/flirting with me in the first place if he wasn't going to consider the implications of if things didn't work out between us, would he be bothered by spending time with me at the Moose still. He obviously doesn't like hanging out with me on our own, because he makes no effort to talk to me when we're in a small group or just by ourselves, and he's a total dick to me when I try to say anything to him at all. It was funny, on Friday night, someone made a comment about the facial hair growth he had on his face (apparently, he only shaves every couple of days or so...doesn't matter. Looks good on him, really), and he started talking about how he'd seen Jude Law on Oprah, or something, and he looked like he hadn't shaved in a week, and no one seemed to mind. And I started laughing (all us girls did, really), and I said, "But Dave, that's Jude Law!" And he's all, "Well, don't go thinking YOU look anything like Gwyneth Paltrow!" And I said, "Um, I would never compare myself to Gwyneth, Dave. I wasn't the one comparing myself to a hot, young movie star, now was I?" I mean, he's just cantankerous towards me, for no reason. I'd really like to talk to him about it, and tell him to stop it, but I don't know if it would do any good really. It's a good thing the people he hangs out with are all really cool. Because he's a total fuckhead, and they all seem to know it.

Saturday night I just sat and talked to another friend all night, and then went home and crashed out. Yesterday, I was asked to help my bartender friend clean up the new house she just bought, so we went and shopped for a bit at Target, and then we went to her new house (which is very cute...), and I cleaned the bathroom (because I'm good at it, dammit), and she cleaned the floors and the kitchen, and then she took me back home. I met her roommate for the first time, too. quite a flirty guy. What is it with guys that work in a bar? They just seem to always flirt. No matter what. Crazy. But fun! :)

I think that what I might do is see if one of Dave's guy friends might be willing to talk to him, maybe. I mean, I don't want to be the source of any discomfort for him, really, but I think there's nothing I can do about it, actually. Whatever his beef is, if it's because I'm showing up and hanging out, then I would rather just stop hanging out with those folks. I have a feeling that the only person that'd be happy about that is Dave, though. I'll ask my girlfriends tonight and see what they think. Dave might not even show up to watch the game tonight, but if he does, then I guess we'll just see how it goes. And I'll just keep my distance from him.

You know, for a guy that I hung out with for a mere 5 nights total (yep, that's it...5 nights. Sheesh!), he's getting an awful lot of time in my head all together. I guess it's because it wasn't so obvious that he was an ass, and then it became more and more obvious that he was, and now I'm stuck sitting here wondering how I was ever attracted to him in the first place. Bleh. :)

Now I'm looking forward to just finishing this week out, and heading back to Cali next week for some fun time off. Maybe I'll be able to get together with some folks in San Diego one of the nights I'm there, and having the time to hang out with the Twin is always fun. So I need to just stop worrying. But saying it and doing it are two very different things. *sigh!* Wish me luck!


FaithsTwin said...

Nahhh- no need to stop going there just because of a new dick.

I say do your best to ignore him and hope he stops being so cranky all the time and move on. You never know, maybe he has hemroids or something and his mood has nothing to do with anyone but himself! I know I spelled hemroids wrong, but seriously, how DO you spell that?

Faith said...

I know...we all look at each other after he leaves with the confusion showing very clearly. I've asked everyone if this is normal, and they all say he's just being cranky. I just feel sorta bad for him, is all. Because, after all, I *AM* a decent human being. So worrying about whether a friend is happy or not is common for me.

But as far as he's concerned, I think I'm going to move past that basic decent human being response at this point and just say Fuck That Dude!! He needs therapy, or something...

FaithsTwin said...


Now as far as the worrying about getting to Witchita on time? I prefer to think of that as "planning ahead." No need to worry you're worrying too much- you're just planning for what should or could occur, that's all. :)