Fuck this shit.
I've worked out 3 nights in a row this week. It sucks...I'm not in the mood, but I'm less in the mood to be Fatty McFatass right now, so I'm forcing myself. Last night, I figured it'd be easier to just eat less, so I'm working on that, too. But I'll tell you what...I've been sleeping like a log (a fat log, but a log, no less...) this week, and it's been difficult to wake up in the morning. So I'm wearing myself out, for sure.
Today, I read an article about how the government has apparently released their new suggestions for healthy living. Exercise 60 - 90 minutes per day. Ok, does getting up and showering in the morning count as 30 minutes of that, by any chance? Because it does take a LO-HOT of effort for me to do that activity, so I'm hoping it counts. And fat (heh) chance of a 60 - 90 minute workout happening every goddam day, if it's got to be that much of a strenuous, cardiovascular activity. I'm fine with striving for 4 days per week of 45 minutes of activity. Sometimes, my workouts on the weekend, especially in the spring and summertime, consist of my yard work. That's ok, according to the government, as long as I'm doing something strenuous like chopping wood. Um. Yeah, I don't have any wood to chop, but mowing my lawn does get my heartrate up, so I'm going to count that instead.
I just hate this constant work, work, work at trying to stay below a size 16. I want to be a 14 again, real bad. Bad enough to forget going to McDonald's for breakfast twice a week when I can afford it, and bad enough to stop caving in to my BLT and taco salad cravings for lunch. Bad enough that my dinner portion sizes will be cut in half, and my snack foods are going to start consisting of broccoli and cauliflower florettes. I still want some beer on the weekends, but thanks to the latest happenings at the Moose, I'll be drinking far less of it, I'm sure.
I'm usually pretty accepting of my body as is. But I've reached the point where I don't accept it any more. Do I hate this feeling more than I hate eating healthy and forcing myself to exercise regularly? We'll have to see...