I graduated from Pepperdine University in 1996 with an English Lit degree. Now, I love my alma mater. I really do. I wish our mascot wasn't a "wave", but it makes sense since the school is in Malibu, and all. Proud of the education I got there, love what it stands for, love that it's widely known even though it's a relatively small school...it's a good place, and I'm glad I graduated from there. But lately, they've been driving me a little bit buggy.
A couple of months ago, I received an e-mail from them asking me to update my information in the student directory. They had a link to the web page, and a secure "code" that was assigned only to me...I went out, filled in the info, and moved on with my life. But they didn't, it seemed. They kept sending me e-mails asking me to update the info (even though I'd received a confirmation stating that they were happy I'd taken the time to update, and thanking me for my participation), and over the past 3 weeks, I've started getting mail as well. This week, it was an "urgent notice", and it really ticked me off.
First of all, with all the shit that's been sent to me over this simple "where you at, what do you do?" issue, I almost wish they didn't know where I'm at any more! They have my home phone number, they have my address, they know that I graduated from their freaking undergrad school, so MOVE ON, right? Especially since I finally gave them money a couple of weeks ago, after they've been begging me for it for the past 9 years. (Jeezy...has it been that long? Christ!) But no. They want me even more, now. I should've known. It's like feeding a seagull or a duck. You give one a piece of bread or a fry, and suddenly, you have a pack of the things all over you wanting every last piece of food you have, and they won't give up until they're sure they've gotten it all. FUCK, people!! Leave me alone, already!
So last night, I open yet ANOTHER e-mail from them. "Please call this number and update your information..." I'd had enough. I picked up the phone, as it was an 800-number and therefor free, and called them to tell them to kindly buggar off. I spoke to Joel. He works for some company that is compiling the info for Pepperdine, and will later be offering me the opportunity to reserve a directory for myself once they've been updated and printed. I tell Joel he doesn't need to go as far as that, because I can assure him that I can't afford to reserve a table at McDonald's right now, much less a directory telling me where people I don't know live, what they do, and what kinds of little families they all have now. I couldn't care less. But I was calling to tell them to leave me alone, as I updated this information online over a month ago, and they need to stop sending me mail and e-mails harassing me about it. He says that they are aware of the fact that I updated it online, but they needed me to call to verify it. (!!!) Ok then, Joel...let's get on with this and get it over with, k? So he checks my address, my phone number, and then asks me to verify my profession. "I don't have one right now. That's why I left that blank in the form online." Joel tells me that it says I'm an administrative assistant. "I was, but I'm not any more, and again, I left that blank in the online form for just that very reason." Ok, he says. So what industry am I in? Is it still in the insurance field? "Um, no. I never worked in insurance...I worked in the mortgage industry before. But I'm jobless right now, Joel. I don't have an industry. Again, the reason why I left that area blank online! I'm not crazy when I remember that it was optional to fill that section out, right Joel?" No, he assures me, it was optional information, but don't I want to let my old classmates know what I'm up to, and network, blah, blah, blah..."No, Joel. I don't give a rat's ass if people know what I'm doing. Especially since I'm currently working as a temp while I try to get a voice over career off the ground." So Joel asks if he can state that I'm in the entertainment industry, since I'm interested in and trying to get involved in voice over? "Boy Joel, you're good. Sure. Why don't you put that down as the industry I'm involved in."
We finished up soon after that...after he again offered to reserve my copy of the directory, which I told him again I wouldn't be able to pay for, plus I'm sure I'll get about 3,000 offers to reserve the damned thing again between now and when they publish it. He assures me that this is my only chance to reserve/buy one. I assure him right back that I DON'T HAVE THE FUCKING CASH TO BUY ONE!!!! And we say goodbye, and it was finally done.
Joel also assured me that the e-mails/mail would stop now that I'd called to verify my info that I'd already taken time to verify via the web. We shall see, Joel. Now go peck at another person's fries...you can't have any more of mine!