Wednesday, August 02, 2006

My Idiot List So Far...

People are pissing me off left and right this morning. Just doing little, dumb things that pick away at my outer ability to pretend I’m happy with all the idiots of the world at once, and make it much for dangerous for the idiots that remain for the rest of the day.

And it’s only 8:20 a.m. I have a feeling that it’s gon’ be a looooonnnng day.

Idiot #1: Woman that changed the channel at the gym from ESPN to fucking VH1 so she could watch videos while she ran for 15 minutes. I was watching both ESPN and the news on ABC, but I was forced to just watch the news after she changed the channel. I gave her a dirty look as she climbed onto the treadmill next to me, but she seemed to have cared less. Fucking idiot. Her breath smelled, too. That’s two days in a row with nasty smelling people getting on treadmills right next to mine. Did I offend the workout gods in some manner to deserve punishment like this? (I changed the channel when I first got there on a t.v. that was stuck on a Gunthy Renker infomercial. When I was done making the change, a woman on the treadmills thanked me. That’s the difference between an idiot and someone using common sense.)

Idiot #2: The guy who ruined the War of the Roses bit on 96.5 the Buzz this morning. He was a dick, and he didn’t play it up nearly as fun as some guys have that are aware of what’s up when the radio station calls them. He sounded all cocky, and right away it was obvious that he knew what was going on, and he told Efentra that they needed to give up the bit as it was getting old, and he was just not any fun at all. I think his name was Ed or Al or something…so Ed or Al, if you’re reading this? You’re a twat for not being any fun. Idiot.

Idiot #3: My lawn guy is not being smart about his mowing right now. First of all, he’s on shaky ground as it is after he ignored a job I paid him to do back in April for a total of 3 months…I had two tree-like bush things on the south side of my house that I wanted to have torn out. He said he could do it for $50, so he came and cut them down one day in April, but he didn’t finish the job. He didn’t have anything with him to remove the stumps, so he said he would return the next day with a shovel. Yeah, 3 MONTHS LATER, after two letters from me and countless phone calls, he finally removed the stumps (which were starting to grow tree-bush things on them again) in July. (And then he had the balls to call me the Saturday after he removed the stumps…seemingly just to chat about the job and make sure I had noticed he’d gotten it done and all. But I could tell after a couple of seconds what was really going on. "Yeah, it was real hot that day, too. And it took me over an hour to remove just that one stump at the front corner of the house. It was a tough one!" he said. I replied, "That’s terrible! Man, you really should have removed them back in April when I first asked you to, and then it wouldn’t have been so hot, at least. Hey, I’ll pop your check for June in the mail today. Have a great weekend!" and I hung up. I think the dude was going to ask me for more money for that job, if you can believe it! I was already basically withholding his June payment until he took the stumps out anyway, which I think he kinda figured out when it didn’t come on the 16th or 17th of the month. Jackass…) At this point, I had been asking him for almost 2 months to please mow my lawn on a weekly basis instead of every two weeks. We were getting a lot of rain back in May, June, and even part of July, and the lawn was constantly overgrown and nasty looking when he let it grow for two weeks between mows. He always had excuses for not getting to it…his team was either backed up because of the time lost due to rainy days, or there was a holiday that happened, or the stars weren’t aligned properly that week, or some such shit, and it became a pain in my ass. By mid-July, we seemed to be on track, though. And then the rain stopped. So I water with a sprinkler as best I can, but my grass still looks like it’s burned up in some places and just barely making it in others, and so last week I was going to call him to make sure he didn’t come to mow. But when I went home on Wednesday at noon, he’d already come of course. And mowed a lawn that clearly didn’t need to be mowed. This week, I’ve only had the chance to water once, so the lawn doesn’t need to be mowed again. I decided to catch him as early as I can, and called him while on my way to work today. I asked him to please not mow until next week and hopefully we’ll get some rain like they’re saying we’re going to get, or at least I’ll have more of a chance to water this week, or what have you. He said no problem. And then he asked me if I’d sent him his payment for July yet. I told him it’s my plan to get it out today, as I just got paid and the boyfriend just gave me his household contribution last night, so it should be in the mail soon.

Dude! It’s only the 2nd! I think I had him scared last month after I waited so long to pay him for June. But you know what? That was his own damned fault. Plus, the guy doesn’t even give me invoices, or anything. So I have to make sure to note the days he mows, and then send him checks according to my own calculations. Hm. Might be fun to fuck with that actually. Just to send him the wrong payment, and have him call me all "WTF?" and be able to say, "Hey man, give me invoices for your work provided, and I’ll be able to pay you properly, right?" But this season is almost over. And next season, I’ll be finding a new lawn guy, is the plan. Because this guy is an asshat. I’m tired of his shit.

Idiot #4: So yesterday, I worked on a new postcard to mail out regarding a property we’re managing in the northland. I pulled it together with the help of one of the brokers in charge of the property, and it looked pretty damned good when we were done with it. We both liked it a lot, anyway, but he needed to run it by the other broker, who is sort of his boss (not mine…his.) before we could place the order for the postcard printing. Today, I come in to find the postcard printed out, scrawled all over with changes that this guy wants made which aren’t even possible to make. He wants the text to be larger when it’s as large as it can be at this point! He wants me to add shit and move things around, and it just was so fine the way it was, guys. He’s such a fucktard. He’s just changing things to be a pain, which is how he works. I think he thinks I’m an idiot, probably because I’m fat and not attractive to him and so he can’t sleep with me to make me his little pet. (Not that I would sleep with him if he did find me attractive...bleh! He's so slimy...) He wanted my coworker to hire a different admin when she was looking for a new one last year, and I’m pretty sure that girl was pretty and thin and just his type, and he’s still pissed at us both for going against his wishes. Oh well. He’ll learn eventually, I guess. And if not, oh well! Less work for me. :)

So now I’m kinda in a rotten mood. I blame the idiots, but we’ll see if I can’t improve my attitude through proper hard work and the like over the next few hours. Maybe some blog reading will cheer me a bit. I’m gonna go see. Hopefully, everyone is being witty and entertaining today…do NOT piss me off further, muthafuckers! (Love you!!)

4 comments:

martinoffroad said...

Treadmills are evil, thats why there is the great outdoors, makes for a much better workout, if walking or running is in order. No stinky people to put up with.

Faith said...

Walking in constant 72 - 75 degree temps = good workout.

Walking in constant 85 - 95 degree temps at 40+% humidity = bullshit workout that would make me die.

Yeah, I prefer the indoor treadmill version, actually. I have a treadmill at home, but it seems pointless (and is too noisy) to get on it when I first get up at 5 a.m. only to then get into my car to go to the gym a half hour later where I can complete the rest of my workout. I'm not a celebrity, nor am I just plain rich, so I can't afford a home gym at this point, and a treadmill and 10 lb weights at home aren't doing the job at this point, unfortunately.

I do envy those who are able to bear the heat and humidity (or freezing temps when that time of year comes 'roud) during their outdoor workout, though. I see them every day as I drive to the gym and then on to work. I can't say I don't think they're just a little cookoo, but to each their own. :)

Coley said...

Oh lady, the people who change things JUST to change them piss me off. I work in marketing, and anytime I create anything that has to be "reviewed" or approved, I make at least two big fat things that will have to be changed, in the hope the reviewer will change those, and leave the rest of the piece alone.
If that made any sense at all.

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