Monday, October 30, 2006


"Bad things happen in threes, you know," New Friend at the Moose said to me on Saturday after I finished watching USC lose obnoxiously to Oregon State. ("Losing painfully" = losing by 10 or more points. "Losing obnoxiously" = being down by more than 10 points at the beginning of the 4th quarter, still holding out hope that they might start playing like their offense has a teensy bit of talent, dealing with your usually cool friends being assholes about the loss, and then watching as the game ends with them losing by 2 points. 2POINTS DAMMIT!!!)

"Oh're right! What else can happen to me this week?" I replied, not really wanting to think about what else could happen to me.

"You'll probably leave here tonight and get t-boned as you pull out of the lot."

"I'll drink to that, New Friend." New Friend had bought me a pitcher of half cider, half Boulevard Wheat. I was still working on enjoying my first glass of it at that point. (He also had one, since he was nice enough to buy me the pitcher...) While I didn't really think anything else bad was going to happen, I couldn't help but wonder. After a few minutes, though, I forgot about the game, forgot about my crappy week, and just settled into having a few drinks and having some fun while doing it. It went well.

Then I went home. It was about 10-ish...I hadn't eaten since 2:30 or 3, and I was hungry. I decided to have a cigarette and the last wheat beer we had in the fridge. I let the dog out of her crate, and followed her outside to smoke my cigarette. The weather was great, I was happy to be as tipsy as I was, and I noticed the dog wasn't going down onto the grass to take care of business. "C'mon Iz! Let's go pee! C'mon!" I encouraged her by stepping down onto the first step toward the lawn. She followed me, but kind of stayed by my feet. I started to step down another step, and she went down two, staying on the bottom step, but still not heading to the grass. "Fine, I'll come down with you, you silly..."

And I really did. I missed the bottom step, though, landing on my left foot in an awkward way on the stone pavers below the bottom step, twisting my ankle, and gracefully falling to the ground while still managing to not spill my beer or drop my cigarette. It didn't take long for me to realize I'd hurt myself pretty badly. My left ankle looked...wrong. It was in the wrong place, it seemed. Thank goodness after a trip to the ER, some x-rays, and some really lovely poking and proding by the ER doctor assigned to me, we found that it wasn't wrong, but just extremely swollen in an immediate way. Not broken, but still rather wounded.

Here's what it looked like after we'd returned from the ER, and I'd calmed down enough to take a few pictures:

Here's another angle of it:

Yesterday, I felt a bit better, but sleep had been uncomfy, and pain that wouldn't go away set in at about 6:30 a.m. I also hadn't eaten since 3 the day before, and I was feeling really, really hungry by Sunday morning. I had to cancel plans to go to the wedding shower and baby shower that were lined up for the day...even though the doctor at the ER encouraged me to put weight on the foot to help the ligaments heal properly, or whatever, I still had to ice it every 2 - 3 hours for 20 minutes, and I was moving pretty slow everywhere. My foot feels numb wherever there's bruising, which by today is everywhere, but yesterday, looked like this:

Today, it's progressed even further down my foot towards my toes, and feels pretty damned funky. The pain isn't bad, though, and I didn't even fill the prescriptions I was given for the pain killers. (Vicodin and niproxin, I think. Not necessary, it seems...) I'm just taking 3 Advil every 4 hours, to help the swelling and assist with the little bit of pain I do have. Oh, and in the picture above, my leg looks all denty and stuff because of the way the brace I got pushes on the swelling. It's purdy, no?

So I've got a little question for much do you think the brace they gave me at the ER is gonna cost me? I say $75. The fiance says maybe $50 - $70. Our friend Alisha thinks it'll be more like $150. Ooh! Heather, I bet you have a good idea, huh? Check it out...

It's keeping my ankle stable so that it can't collapse to the left or right again. It's starting to bug me a bit, and I really hope I don't have to wear it any more after Friday. But to be honest, if it costs anywhere near $150, I might have to figure out a way to work it into my wedding outfit, for fuck's sake. It's FOAM!! Why do they charge so much for so little, is what I wanna know?!

Anyway, that was #3 in my book. So the universe can fuck off now, ok? OK??



lyn said...

oi. ouch. feel better.

Heather said...

I don't really know what the going rates for a splint is, although yours is one of the nicer ones I have seen. I won't even begin to tell you how much my knee brace was (it's the kind professional athletes wear when they blow out their knee). Everything is inflated in the medical field, so $150 doesn't sound too far fetched...but maybe they had a surplus of them and you'll get a discount.

When I saw your foot, I figured it was broken. It looked awful. I'm glad is was a sprain (even those aren't fun either). Keep it elevated. If you don't have ice bags, frozen peas work just as good...30 minutes on, 30 minutes off.

Just don't eat the peas when you are done.

Faith said...

You should see it now. My flip flop won't even fit it, what with the swelling by the toes I've got going now!

I've got nothing to elevate it on here at work, so hopefully my evening elevating will be enough to help it over the next few days. I'm icing it as we speak, though. I need to bind some books, but they're just gonna have to wait another 15 minutes, dammit. :)

This thing is NOT comfortable. At all. Bleh...

FaithsTwin said...

Wow. See? I would have totally said that is a broken bone. It is pretty much how I pictured it after you did your best to sobbingly describe it to me when you called.

Ex-co-worker said...

Ouch! I would swear it was broken as well. It does not hurt when you walk? Ohhhhhh the thought is making me sick to my stomach right this minute. I hope you heal quickly. I will start the "FOAM BRACE fund, and see how much I can raise for you. I will make the first donation. At $150.00 you may want to bronze it, then again maybe not. I want to be the first to your brace :P

Ex-co-worker said...

sign..... I want to be the first to SIGN your brace! I better stop posting comments I am making myself look like an ass!

travelingal said...

new to the site...followed a fellow republican over here from XO's

Bet your brace costs more than $ that prescription for when you get the bill

Seriously, been there done that with a nasty sprain and it ain't no fun..get better soon

Xavier Onassis said...

Holy Crap!

I once sprained my ankle playing Ping Pong.

Go ahead! Yuk it up! Ping Pong can be a brutally physical ...oh, who am I kidding. I was a klutz. Still am.

Seriously, I'm with Alisha. That brace is made out of FOAM and VELCRO. Both of which I'm pretty sure were developed by NASA to help get us to the moon in the '60s.

High-Tech stuff like foam and velcro don't come cheap. All of that R&D has to be paid for eventually.

BTW, so glad I could bring you two Republicans together. I claim dibs on the video rights if you go getting "freaky".

Pensive Girl said...

so sorry.

i'm back in my boot. so we're both gimping around the neighborhood i guess.

get better soon.

and i think the brace will be pricey. maybe $150?
hope not though.

shell said...

Hey, Faith... I've been able to skip to my own lou for a while now, but after hearing about what you've been going through recently, and after peeking in on you and seeing what your poor ankle looks like, I gotta tellya, the oldestsister genes kick RIGHT the hell in... honey, I am so sorry that this had to happen to you. I am so saddened by seeing what the foot looks like, and I wish that I had the geographic ability to come out and help take care of you, even if this isn't what you want... I am so sorry, sweetie. If there IS anything I can do that you can think of, please please let me know. I am currently going through my own personal hell, and to see that you are dealing with some pretty loathesome sh#t yourself just makes me feel worse. And considering that we ALL know that it's all about ME, well... at ANY rate, please let me know if Oldest Sister can help in any way, and, kiddo, I am THERE. I hope you are feeling better soon. And I know that the universe will set itself straight for you soon -- and f*ck any talk of the fabulous lessons you might learn in the meanwhile. I have been forced to swallow my OWN funky-spunk choke-worthy lessons recently, and, know what? F*C& it!!! I love you, honey. I **do** wish you'd holler if you need anything I can provide somehow, kay? And I understand totally if you don't need a thing. Love and hugs to the fiance, too... (he KNOWS how much your family adores him, right??) OldAssSis