Thursday, November 30, 2006

Pardon us...it's our first snow day together.

It's Izzy's first time seeing ice, snow, and all the cold that goes with it. Yesterday, she wasn't comfy going out in the ice storm to pee, etc...unless someone was with her the first couple of times. Today, since I showed her it was snowing out, she chose to ignore her probable need to pee by sleeping on my lap all afternoon. But I finally figured it was time to introduce her to the soft, fluffy stuff after a couple of inches had fallen.

And now she won't come back inside.

Well, actually, she does come back inside, but only to run up to me all excited-like, wagging her tail, covered in quickly melting snowflakes, only to turn around and head back out into it to romp some more.


I've been waiting for this for a while. I'm glad she likes it! Happy snowday, everyone!

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

How can I be so busy when I'm only working half days?

Ok, the part time gig is going well so far. The place is a MESS, and can certainly use some of my organization techniques. Since I'm only helping out for a bit, and it's not me that's going to be using the filing system, I'm sticking to their requests on specific file-creation ideas. But I'm just tweaking it a bit so it's as useful as possible. I hope it works out for them! They're really cool people...

Not much else going on, except for the dog being an ass and eating the insides of it's latest fave dog toy. Which I had to then pull out of her ass this morning after she tried to go poo, but was pretty unsuccessful at it. At least she got a little bit of it out so I was able to pull the rest out for her. GREAT way to start the day, actually...I'd highly recommend it to everyone.

This weekend, I get to go try on wedding dresses for the first time, and hopefully will have a better idea of what kind of dress I can actually pull off when the day is said and done. I have a couple of trusty, wonderful, honest girlfriends going with me, and I'm thinking that together, we can all figure out how to fit my big ol' ass into the most fabulous dress we can find for the best price possible. It should be a lovely day. I've gotten more and more excited about looking at dresses as the past few weeks have gone by, so I'm just hoping that the actual act of trying to get into the dresses I've chosen to try doesn't give me a heart attack. I guess we'll just have to wait and see!!

Ok, fiance and I have an appointment to go meet with the photographer in about an hour, so I'd better get back to napping on the couch while I can. I can't wait till I find a new job, if only for my faith in it's ability to help me sleep a bit better at night! And if anyone else is having any trouble sleeping at all, perhaps you can just print this post out and keep it next to your bed for future assistance...

Monday, November 27, 2006

Miserable

The job search is miserable. I'm seriously considering looking into selling sex toys from home on the internet. I'm not kidding. I don't even use the things, but apparently, the mark-up is unbelievably high on them.

I need to go contact the guy I'm supposed to be working part-time for over the next few weeks, but honestly, I have to find something permanent and full-time soon so I don't lose anymore sleep over it, dammit. AUGH!

Firstly, I will be transfering money from my savings so I can pay my mortgage on Thursday, thankyouverymuch. I'd better head over and do that right now, so I don't have to worry about it any more. Ta for now!

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Last Day

Today's my last day here at my old job. Seems oddly fitting that I have a terrible sore throat and a cold coming on, since I haven't had a single sick day in the entire almost-year since I started here. I had plenty of days off, but none of them were sick days. Weird, eh?

I will miss a lot of the people I work with a tremendous amount, and as happens any time I move on from a job, I'm left wondering how close of contact we'll remain in, even though promises have been made and e-mails/phone numbers have been exchanged. While I'm pretty interested in what will happen here after I've left (other individuals have since decided to move on from their positions as well...completely unrelated decisions, of course, but interesting nonetheless), I don't know if it'll stay that way after I've had a week of non-exposure to the ever so cool boss that up and decided to fire me almost 4 weeks ago.

Regardless, I have a ton to do around here today, what with the clean-up I'd like to perform on a file drawer next to my chair that might come in handy if it were just organized better, and the other regular tasks that people are still asking me to perform, even though I'm only about 3 hours away from saying goodbye forever to this position, so I'd better skedaddle.

For the record, no, I haven't found another job yet. I do have a part time opportunity that will likely work out, thanks to my associations with people at the Moose, so that will be helpful in the meantime, but as far as full time work goes, I'm still in the middle of interview madness. Which, of course, has been interrupted by the holiday.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! And please, don't call it "Turkey Day." It's not that...it's a day to be thankful for what we have, and not everyone is eating turkey, anyway. The fiance and I will be feasting on cornish game hens, for example. So yeah...happy Thanksgiving. Go forth and spread the love, dammit...

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Commercials

Verizon? Yeah, we get it. You have a network. Congratufuckinglations. I think you've driven the point into the ground now, though, so if you could stop making the stupid commercials ("Can I get a bag for them?" Um, DUMB!!), and maybe even find a new "mascot" besides the dorky guy in the plain gray windbreaker and glasses, I'm pretty sure all of America would thank your asses.

Local radio stations in the Kansas City area who have successfully managed to replace all the annoying political commercials we had been dealing with until a couple of weeks ago with your super-informative (and musical!) commercials about how you're already playing all Christmas tunes all the time!!? Fuck off. I constantly have that dumb-ass Paul McCartney "...siiiimply haaaving a wonderful Christmastime!" going around and around in my brain. AND I DON'T WANNA LISTEN TO YOUR STATION ANYWAY!!! 100% Christmas music 'round the clock? IT'S NOT EVEN THANKSGIVING YET, ASSHOLES! GAH! (And for the record, the only Christmas music I enjoy now that I'm a grown-up is the Charlie Brown Christmas cd. I can listen to that over and over again. Well, at least twice in a row. I tire easily of things these days...)

Radio Shack? Your commercials make me never want to shop in ANY of your stores EVER AGAIN!! Not that I shopped there much anyway, you overpriced retards. Heard of Best Buy? Yeah, you might have a problem there, I'd imagine.

Ford, Chevy, and Mercury? Not that I was planning on buying an American car my next time around, but you guys have pretty well driven off my business completely with your oversaturation campaigns. That guy singing about getting up early and being on time? He's annoying. The whole Morningwood selling out not even 6 months after they initially became popular? That's just sad. (And the model you have in your commercials dresses like shit, Mercury. Poor thing. She looks like she could be a really cute girl, too, but that vest-thing in the one commercial? Christ! Blech!!) And I hate the gravely sound to the voice of the guy singing about how "...this is our country," Chevy. As if we weren't already aware of that fact. How long does it take to make a commerical that lasts a minute and a half, anyway? 4 months? 6 months? Good job wasting a phenomenal amount of money on something that probably just annoys more than half of "our country" anyway.

That is all. (For now...mwahahahahahahaha....)

Monday, November 20, 2006

N-o-t-h-i-n-g spells "bored"

I don't know why I'm even working this week. I guess I'm getting some stuff done, but it feels weird to me. Like I'm stretching out the inevitable. I'm glad I AM working, don't get me wrong on that. But it just seems strange. Probably because of the short week and all. Or maybe because it's been almost 4 weeks since I got fired. That could be it.

Had a TERRIBLE nightmare last night that I've been trying to figure out with the help of some websites. Basically, there was a demon dog in it, I was taunting said demon dog even though I was terrified of it, and at the "end" of the dream, the dog had caught up my left hand in it's claws and was removing the fingernail from my middle finger. That's when I woke up. I couldn't go back to sleep, even though I was exhausted, so I tried to get the fiance to come to bed with me (he has the day off today, which meant he could stay on the couch and "watch" t.v. for as long and until as late as he wanted last night...), but he wasn't in the mood to go to bed, so I wound up sitting with him and the dog (who I didn't want near me after my scary dream, oddly enough) watching "Young Guns" on the TiVo. After about a half hour, I went ahead and went to bed again, and I was successful in getting back to sleep, thank goodness. But it sucked to have that dream, that's for damned sure! I'm sure it just has to do with the state of flux I'm in right now, or whatever. But I'd prefer not to have any more like it this week, if possible.

At one of the interviews I was at last week, I talked to the lady that was interviewing me about how I plan on managing property some day. It's what my father's done all my life (and most of his), seems like something I'd really enjoy, and I look forward to being a part of the commercial property world on the ownership side of things. I told her this so that she would tie together my interest in continuing to work in commercial real estate in some form or another, and also so she would have an idea of where my interest in this particular field came from. She, however, interpreted that as me saying that it's what I'd prefer to do...you know, instead of being an admin for the rest of my life.

Ok, first of all, I don't plan on being an admin for the rest of my life, no. Will I wind up being one for a good long time to come? Probably. But when I talked to the placement agency rep that is managing this account (she set up the interview, is their contact for the second interview, etc...), and she told me that this woman had a problem with me wanting to manage properties someday, I was all, "So, I can never be a property owner? Is that the case? Because, hate to say it, but I'm going to be one relatively soon, and if that isn't something they'll allow me to do, then this won't work out. Does she know I own my own home and manage that property already?"

I mean, WTF??? I can't manage property AND be an admin at the same time? Whatever. Property management relies heavily on two things: a responsible owner who leases the space, manages the leases of said space, and maintains the property; and a property owner that has a talented individual or team of individuals to monitor the properties and is able to fix certain problems that come up or contact contractors who can do it for them if it's outside of their realm of expertise. Just about all of the properties my father owns in Riverside, CA are farther from his home than is reasonable for him to be able to manage them all on his own. Dad always had a guy who drove around to the properties, monitored them, made sure they were all ok, and contacted dad whenever he needed to take care of something. That was the guy dad called when a tenant called the office first to report an issue. Sheeit. I mean, I really hope that property management will be a lucrative means of making a living eventually, but I certainly can't do it right now (um, unless someone has $20 million they can give me so I can buy some property I'm interested in...no? Ok then...), and it's not like owning one property is going to completely consume my life once I AM able to buy something that I can afford.

Some people only see the teeny, tiny picture I guess. Me? I try to look at the picture from ALL angles before coming to a conclusion or hypothesizing about an outcome.

This was a good weekend, overall, though. Football was fabulous!! This week, we're looking forward to cooking a little Thanksgiving feast for two and then watching more football that night, and I'm looking forward to having 4 days off. Oh wait! I have an infinite amount of time off, actually! Aren't I the coolest...

Friday, November 17, 2006

You know, I really am not in the mood for any of this shit today.

So I'm gonna leave you all with a photo of what appears to be Trent Green's tryout for his alternate dream of dancing with the Rockettes, which we should all encourage him to pursue, but someone really should remind him to take off the helmet before he hits the stage. It's kinda distracting.

"Pretty butterflies! LOVE the butterflies!!!"

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Take the time...

Ok, this just made me cry. What a wonderful, wonderful human being. Kansas City's very own Secret Santa - now known to the world as Larry Stewart - is finally revealing himself after years of giving away Christmas "bonuses" to random strangers because he has cancer and worries that this might be the last year he has the opportunity to help people like he does. Go and read the story. You won't be sorry that you took the time to do it, honest.

What an awesome man. If only there could be more like him in the world...

It's kind of a blurry mess

These past couple of days have gone by fastly and furiously. Between work events, interviews, phone calls about interviews, catching up on work due to missed time for interviews, and sleep, I haven't had much time for anything fun, really. (Well, except for the sleep. Because sleep is my fave thing, yo.) Tuesday night I was so exhausted I just wanted to go home and not move for a while. Yesterday, I had a big bunch of caffeine late in the afternoon, so I was ok with doing stuff when I got home, but the entire day was just run, run, run, and I feel like I haven't had any good time to myself really. I also got angry about something that the fiance is going through (KCP&L never cancelled his electric after he moved out of his apartment last February, he didn't get a confirmation number from the person he spoke to about cancelling it, and basically they're now telling him he owes $500 for the past 9 months of electric for an apartment he hasn't lived in. Oh, wait, I'm sorry...he only owes $300 because they had a deposit on file from years ago when he initially moved into His Very First Apartment and had to start up electricity without any credit to his name. So he just forfeited that cash, but since it was from he was 19 or something, he doesn't really care. Which I don't really understand all that much, because someone steals $150 of MY dollars? You KNOW that isn't gonna go over well...), and had to calm myself down after the initial discussion about it with him.

I mean, he was just gonna pay them that $300! Without any kind of fight!! WTF? I asked him to please contact his old landlord and see if he could write a letter to KCP&L stating the date fiance moved out of the apartment, and also ask him if he could find out at least the last name of the individual who moved in there and get the date they moved in, so we could contact KCP&L and let them know that they should have switched the electric into their names, and THEY'RE the ones that owe KCP&L for the last however many months of electricity they've been using. I don't know if it'll work, but dammit, we have to at least try!!

I also told fiance that it's a good idea to make sure to get the name of any person that helps him with any kind of customer service situation, regardless of what it is. IPod not working, and you need to call Apple, or whoever? Get the name of the person who helps when you call. Pizza delivery all botched up, and the manager of the store tells you they're gonna void the charge to your card? Get their name, in case you get charged anyway and need to call back 3 days later to figure out what the hell happened.

And any time something involves a utility, get a fucking confirmation code when you call to cancel your account!

I really, really hope we can resolve this without him having to pay all that cash. We don't need it right now, dammit.

I haven't had a chance to read many blogs lately, and feel very out of the loop. I got about 1/4 of the way down the blogroll yesterday before I had to stop and kick it into gear around the office before the end of the day, and I want to read and catch up and see what's going on!!! Is anything going on that I need to know about?

I also have a zit the size of Montana on my hairline that hurts like a mofo. Those are seriously the worst. There's nothing but skin and skull up at that point of the face, it seems, so why the zit? Of course, they always manage to reach mammoth proportions anyway, and they're the hardest ones to pop! But I finally managed to get it this morning before I put my makeup on. Thank GOD! Now I have a headache, though. Mammoth zit has it's revenge already! Evil mutherfucker...

Ok, I have a task I need to complete that I wanted to do yesterday, but couldn't get started on time to finish it before the end of the day, so I'd better get on it now. Hope everyone's weeks are going ok! I don't know, because I haven't been able to read! Dammit, dammit, dammit...

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Leaving room for sammiches?

Ok, I can understand being down and out. I can even understand being so desperate to help one's family that stooping to robbery seems like the only way out. But this story about a guy that robbed a fucking Subway in Overland Park last night is just sad. Sounds like he was a mess. And while he decided to hit up a place in a more swanky part of town than, say, the area I live in (it's not crappier, it's just older...), it still makes no sense to walk into a Subway to steal money, and to be prepared to carry it out with a duffel bag!

A duffel bag? Really? Aren't we being strangely optimistic for being in the situation we're in, now? Or did this guy have Subway confused with a bank, d'you think?

All I can figure is that he had planned on also getting a few sammiches to go on top of the cash he was gonna get, and he forgot to ask. He was probly about 1/2 a mile away when he thought about it, I bet. "Shit! I forgot to get those footlong italian subs the wife asked for! Now I'm really gonna get it!!"

In my case, I am not down to being desperate enough to need to rob a Subway yet. I've been testing WAY above average for all the companies that have asked me to test my skills at Excel, Word, and Powerpoint for them, and even typed 59 WPM (100% accuracy!) yesterday when I was tested for that. Not bad. I have several interviews going on, and even a possible part-time thing that I can do next week (and possibly even after that, if time allows) to keep the cash-flow going. Today is still busy, though, so I'm gonna get back to it. Thanks for all the good juju y'all have been sending my way! Seems to be working...keep it up! :)

Goodie...

This morning is starting off just lovely. Got here early to compensate for the time I'll be out for lunch and an interview today, and was greeted with an e-mail from a coworker asking me to print every document in the world that ever existed for this open house thingy we're having...which is tomorrow, mind you. Yeah, I'm getting it done, but not without severe difficulties. First, I printed out all the copies from my computer, to save myself the trouble of having to loiter around the machine itself waiting for it to complete my print job. (The printer is about a 2 minute walk from my desk...not a big deal, but when going back and forth and back and forth, it gets old, is the thing.) But when I got up there to collect the print jobs, the printer had run out of the kind of paper I required for my job, and had defaulted to using the letterhead paper that is in another tray. Which has a big red line down one side of it, thereby ruining my print job. Which was only, oh, about 250 pages of stuff, dammit!!! Nah...no biggy. Only costs us $.79 per page, and all. (Shit...$200 worth of copies into the recycling bin. Ouch, ouch, ouch...)

Anyway, then I printed out my next batch of stuff, but I was smart this time...I reloaded the proper paper, and printed one copy to the machine, and then went up there to print off the next 34 copies. Failed to notice that Adobe had done it's weird disappearing line act that it pulls every so often, and so several of my copies came out as phantom floor plans. That's ok...just another $165 into the recycling bin, is all.

Good morning, good MORning! It's a beautiful day today...good morning, good morning to you!

Monday, November 13, 2006

That's right!

This about says it all for me today. USC is #3 on the BCS, Notre Dame is #5, and the next 4 weeks of my life will be absolutely, positively boring between Saturdays. (Well, except for on Wednesdays...Top Chef night, you know.)

Busy day. I'm leaving at 1:30 so I can go home and let the dog out for a bit before I head down to one of the placement companies that I'm working with to take some tests. I took some online from home yesterday for the other company I'm working with, and I felt pretty good about my results. Excel was awesome, of course, and while the Word one was disappointing (it was testing me on Word 2000...I haven't worked in that version of Word since, oh, maybe 2001? Hel-LOOO!!), it was still relatively high. I also got tested in PowerPoint, which wasn't that great of a score (I know how to maneuver and do lots of certain tasks in PowerPoint, but it wanted me to do things I was completely unfamiliar with. Which I'm sure I could learn very quickly and have no problem with in the future, of course...), and the test on Access was not good. But I warned them that I've used it for data entry shit before, and that's pretty much it! So the test was bound to come out kind of not good. It was still fun...

So I'd better get to it, as I have several tasks I need to complete before I head out of here in a few hours. It's Monday, though...watch out for yourselves. Mondays HATE humans...

Friday, November 10, 2006

Well, that's nice then.

Just got the bill for the x-rays for the ankle fun...$111! Not bad, my friends. I can handle that shit.

Didn't say anything about how much they were charging me for the ankle brace or the ice pack, so for now, I'm pretending that they included it in the cost of the ER visit, and am hoping my entire trip up there two short weeks ago only set me back a total of $310. I was imagining much, much worse than that, so I'm having a beer for KU Med tonight, baby! (But I'll be staying off the steps, thanks very much...)

Today is a slow day...but a busy day. I'll take it.

I got a reference to a very cool shop downtown that does photography shtuff that's looking for an administrative something or other, and have a call in to one of the owners to see if he wants to meet anytime soon, so that could be interesting. It might not pay much (I'm gonna pitch for $18, which is still lower than what I really want/deserve as an admin, but they seem to want to only pay $30,000 a year which, ouch. Can't really do that...), but it's uber-cool, and would definitely be different and fun and all new to me. Plus they have a dog that they let run around the place! Neato. I'm up for anything at this point. I'm tired of the every-day administrative gig, I think. When I start considering waitressing again, you know my wanderlust has truly kicked in. Because, oh holy hell, I hated waitressing! I didn't mind the customers so much...especially when they gave me money at the end of their stay with me. It was the bastards I had to work with...the 16 year old something or others that all climbed right up the wrong side of my ass every day. The ones that had a roof over their head for free, and didn't understand what it was like to have to rely on good tips in order to pay rent, bills, and for groceries from week to week. Assholes. I bet half of them are still living at home, smoking pot with their buddies on their days off, and not taking life seriously at all even now. Jerks.

It's Friday, as you might have noticed, and I'm just trying to finish up the little tasks that have been given to me so I can get out, buy some beer, head home to make red beans and rice for dinner, sit down and relax with the puppy on my lap, and not worry about anything except getting my car in for servicing tomorrow morning, being able to hit the Moose for a bit tomorrow afternoon, and watching the Oo-Ess-See game tomorrow night, which I can do at home as it will be on FSN, and since it's on at 9:15, that's gonna be a good thing. Because I can drink for much, much less in my own living room I've found!

Startling how the mood can upswing like it does, eh?

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Well, it was bound to happen…mini-meltdown occurred last night after fiancé got home. It was a money/job issue/feeling like an asshole for losing my job thing, probably mixed with a hefty dose of hormonal shift due to my girlie-thingy and all. I almost thought I’d ruined what I was making for dinner (I made the "side dish" and fiancé generously made the "main dish"), but it still tasted really good once I was done blubbering and being comforted. We made Triscuit-encrusted tilapia and whole wheat pasta with white bean sauce. Check out the recipe for the pasta…it made a fabulous side-dish, although I went ahead and omitted the parsley, since I HATE parsley and all. It really was very good. The Triscuit-encrusted thing started as a joke, but fiancé took the idea and ran with it. (I’d forgotten to buy flour when I was at the market, so I told him we could grind up some crackers instead! Who would’ve thunk that the Triscuits would work so well? Not I…)

Not much of anything funny is happening right now, really. I’m having a hard time with the switches between depression and stress, and hate being around people other than my fiancé, or talking to anyone other than the Twin. I stopped answering my home phone a long time ago (only poll-takers and sheriff fund-raisers call me any more…), and when my cell phone rings from a caller that isn’t the Twin or the fiancé, I pretty much ignore it. I feel down and unhappy, and not in the mood to deal with anything else. This job issue may not seem huge to anyone outside of my head, but to me, it IS huge. After next week, I am without a job. I have about $1,200 in savings, and that will barely cover the mortgage and a couple of bills for one month. I’ve only received the bill for the emergency room visit from a week and a half ago so far, but its $198, so I can imagine how much the x-rays, ice-pack, and ankle brace will wind up costing me. Actually, I try not to imagine it. It makes my stomach hurt. Now my car needs fixing, and while I have plenty of room on my credit card to take care of the expense, I was really hoping I wouldn’t have to use that thing again this year. But I have no choice. The car needs attention, and I can’t ignore it any more or I might wind up with a much more costly issue on my hands to deal with.

I go back and forth from wondering whether or not these issues would be harder or easier to deal with if I didn’t have the fiancé in my life. It’s hard to explain, but I feel like I’m one of two captains of a ship, and my side is sinking fast while the other captain is having to over-compensate on his side to try to keep the whole boat from going down. If I were the only captain, would I be more depressed? Likely. But would I feel more in control? I don’t know. I understand that he and I will be linked to each other until death do us part in less than a year, and we’re going to have to start dealing with issues like these as a "team" from now on, but I guess I just feel really, really shitty for being so weak. I hate that I'm causing him to have to over-compensate for us.

There isn’t really anything funny happening in the news right now, either! So sick of politics, I could throw up, I’ve been reading things I wouldn’t usually read, such as the aftermath of Britney filing for divorce from Kevin. I mean, who the fuck cares, right? But the fact that he’s requesting full custody is kinda funny. He’s such an idiot. Apparently, the community assets between the two are "uncertain" which I guess suggests that there might have been a prenup in place. Which makes Federline even MORE of an idiot! I actually am looking forward to how it all turns out.

God, that’s sad…

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Because I love my walnut tree soooo much!

Fuck the tree. There are enough trees in our yard already...we don't need another one.

Sorry I'm reneging on the vote for what kind of tree we should ask for! I'm sure everyone was waiting with baited breath for that survey to happen...

The job search is going...ok. So far. I've been meeting with placement companies this week, and they seem to have options that might be perfect for me, so I'm doing what I can to get everything they need from me done. Next Monday, I get to go in and be tested on my typing, Word, Excel, PowerPoint, and Outlook skeeills. I love those things. NO PRESSURE!!! Yeah, right...

It starts out with some basic stuff like creating tables in Word, or sorting things in Excel, and you get lulled by the gentleness of the requests. And then it suddenly launches you into a level of Word you were unaware existed, and it's asking you to perform tasks like, "Assist with the delivery of the next child being born at St. Luke's...GO!" And you float over the toolbar options at the top, silently repeating to yourself over and over in your head that it MUST be a function under Tools, right? It can't possibly be something that would be under Edit...that's just wrong! Or when it gets to the point in Excel where it asks you to balance the budget for the State of Kansas, and you figure that it must be a trick question, but you can't get past that request to move on to the rest of the test, and you finally just decide to guess incorrectly 3 times in a row so it will just let you pass to the next question already. That's fun.

And why, WHY do I get all shaky when I'm actually being timed for my typing skills? I type every single mutherfucking day...this is not new. I'm pretty accurate as well. (Even though I had two mistakes in the last three sentences that I had to go back and fix...) I just hate being timed. No fun.

Anyway, I haven't found a job yet, still looking, blahblahblah, looking forward to being done with this shit.

Ohmygod, I'm so busy today, why the HELL am I writing another post? I'm an idiot. Gotta go...

p.s. My car needs servicing. Lovely timing, eh? Yeah, I thought so, too. I was smizart, though, and asked a couple of BMW owners here in the office where they take their cars to, and found a reputable place that can do the work for 1/2 the price of the dealer, which was where I was resigining myself to take it in a couple of weeks. Instead, I will take it in for a free brake exam this week, have them perform the 30,000 mile or 32,000 mile check, or whatever the fuck it is that it needs, and hopefully pay about $500 total for the stuff, instead of $1,000. That works for me. Even if it doesn't, really. You know what I mean, I'm sure...

On second thought...

Ugh. Having the first period I've had in 3 months right now, and it's not starting out very pretty. I don't think that the whole idea of taking 3 months of pills in a row and only having 4 periods per year because of it is turning out to be a very good decision. The mood swings, cramps, and general discomfort don't seem to be worth the money I'm saving on tampons, that's for damned sure!

I slept like hell last night, thanks to The Foot Of Death. The top of the foot (which isn't even technically part of the "ankle" per se, so I don't know why it's trying to be such an ASS right now!) is now so sensitive to touch that it hurts to have water hit it when I'm in the shower. The inner part of the ankle has shooting pains through it regularly, and the outer part of the ankle gets weak at the end of the day after I've been using it to, you know, walk around and stuff. I'm still favoring the damned thing as I walk around, but it appears to not be enough. It just wants to sit still, or some shit. Well, I can't just sit still, so it needs to fuck off.

Also in The Big News Around Faith and Fiance's House, we are to receive a tree from the city due to their need to remove a tree from our yard during the re-paving project they performed in late spring/early summer. I have a list of trees to choose from, and am having a hard time choosing. So later today, I'll go ahead and pop up the choices I've narrowed it down to for votes from my readers. (Or, rather, from the 4 or 5 of you that actually make comments!) I don't even know where it will fit in the yard, to be honest, and I plan on talking to my lawn & tree guys before making the final decision, but I need to get back to the contracting company with my decision "ASAP." Because they're assholes and all. Have they every gotten back to me about the problem I have with the dent they made in my house when they poured my driveway? No. No they haven't. (I've written two letters now, sent a copy to the city rep who was in charge of monitoring the project, and finally have started getting a response from the paving company over the past couple of weeks, but it's consisted of one of their guys calling me and leaving me a message, and me calling him back and leaving a message, and then nothing else happening since then. That was a week and a half ago. Nice.)

Great. Now I feel nauseous. I love being a girl!

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

A Rant - by Me

On being an admin…

One thing that’s always gotten my goat about my "chosen profession" is that we are always the go-to people for getting most everything done in the office.

We are the ones that order the supplies, so people have pens and paper always at the ready. We are the ones that make sure people get paid properly and on time. We are the ones that fix it when people DON’T get paid properly and on time. We are the ones that make the coffee, answer the phones, type the letters, create the filing system, put the presentations together (at the last minute, usually), order the lunches, prepare the trip itinerary, fill out the expense reports, and deal with the customers while the boss is away.

No, we don't sell anything. We don’t bring any money in for the company. This is true.
But can a company…a SUCCESSFUL company…exist without a decent and proper admin of some sort helping out and getting the little things done?

The answer is no.

So why is it that when we’re stressed, we have to pretend to be happy anyway? Why do we have to always do our jobs with a smile on our faces, no matter what happens? You had to put your puppy to sleep? Tough shit. Your grandmother died? Too bad. You might have cancer and won’t find out for a week? Grin and bear it, sweetie.

If the boss has a fucking hangnail, we’re expected to walk on eggshells and make sure not to upset him further. Why? Because he had the ability, money, and wherewithal to start the company/get into a management position in the first place? So. Congratufuckinglations. Go home and eat the steak you can afford because you don’t pay your admins enough to do all the shit YOU don’t wanna do, while they eat Top Ramen out of the pot they cooked it in, asshole.

The double-standard bullshit gets old after 10 years. Having someone pass along a "good job" or a "well done" every now and then gets old, too. Why are we considered to be a substandard species within the office walls? Because we don’t go out and sell shit like the sales guys/gals do? Well, that’s why they’re the sales people. We’re just the ones that make it possible for them to do their job with a little bit more ease. If we weren’t here, would they be happy doing all the shit for themselves? Especially if they had no one to give them a pay check every week? Yeah, didn’t think so.

I don’t have the time to finish this post…too much stuff to do for everyone else, and no time to do it in. Such is the life of an admin, though. I’d advise against it, if anyone ever asked me, to be quite honest…

Monday, November 06, 2006

Monday, it is!

Ugh. Exhaustion. Hunger. Pain.

Not a stellar afternoon, it seems.

Worked out this morning at the gym after a hiatus that lasted over a week...felt weird being back there, actually. Which really goes to show that I took waaaay too much time off, dammit! I spoke to my trainer on Friday night, and he suggested that I try to come in and then show him my ankle/foot and we'd decide if it was a good idea for me to hop back on any cardio equipment. The bike was what he suggested, I gave it a go (at a lower intensity level, but for a longer period than I usually spend on it as I tend to end my cardio workouts with the bike after first starting on the treadmill or eliptical for 20 - 30 mins...), and while my heel started to get a bit of a dull pain in it about halfway through, the ankle actually felt pretty good until the final 5 minutes. And now, it HURTS! Ow, ow, ow...just, OW! Last night was the first night I was actually experiencing any sharp pain in the ankle area, which is weird. My only thought on it is that now that the swelling is going down, the blood is freely flowing to areas it hasn't been able to get to very easily for the last week, and it's causing it to freak out, or something. Dayum, it hurts.

Anyway, returning to the gym meant a return to the ladies' locker room. I don't know if I'm the only person who goes to my gym that actually is able to think logically and reasonably early in the morning or what, but when I pick a locker, I try to choose one that is at least one locker away from any other lockers that have locks on them (which means that someone has already arrived, put their stuff in said locker, and likely will be changing/showering/dressing in that same area after they're done working out), so that I have a bit of space to get undressed/dressed in after I'm through with my workout. This is also me thinking of those around me, in a back-asswards kinda way, when one thinks about it. I'm concerned about my personal space as well as the other people I share a locker room with. I'm considerate, yo.

So when I finished my workout and found a woman who had chosen a locker right next to mine sitting there, digging through her shit, blocking my locker door with her locker door, I got a little irritated. I said, "Pardon me, I need to get into my locker please." And she was apologetic and moved the door out of the way, but fuck me sideways...is it that hard to figure it out? IS IT??? I know this bothers me more than it might bother the average human being, but it's kind of the same thing to me as people riding my ass when driving behind me, or people edging up all close to me in line at the supermarket. Or random strangers sitting too close to me at the bar when there's tons of room for them to spread out. Hate that shit.

It all worked out fine, I suppose, except more women might have gotten a good look at my boobies as I struggled to put on my bra in a discreet manner after my shower, but that's just fun for them I figure. I'm not modest. Not as much as I used to be, anyway. I'm not all naked-walking-around-putting-on-makeup-for-20-minutes, or what have you, but I'm not so concerned if someone gets a flash of my ass as I put on my underpants, or happen to catch a glimps of my boobies as I remove a sports bra. I just don't care.

I'm trying to eat less as well, trying to stay on the diet, trying to maintain or lose as I workout a bit less with this injury and everything, so I'm really hungry right now. I had soup and crackers for lunch (homemade hamburger soup and Triscuits, no less...), but I had to eat it earlier than usual since I had a meeting with a placement firm in OP at lunchtime, and I was already starving when I scarfed it down at about 11:30 as it was! I found a random rice crispy treat in our snack drawers (which are almost completely bare at this point in the month...) at about 3:30 and I had to eat it, but I'm ok with that. Better to actually give the body some sort of fuel than none at all, I figure. Even if I do wish it was better than a rice crispy treat, dammit. Need to buy more Triscuits on the way home, I think...

With what money, though? Thank goodness the fiance gets paid tomorrow, because I need some cash, dammit! (We share with each other. I buy food and pay bills and put certain decided upon amounts of money into savings when he asks me to...he gives me money when he gets paid. It works out pretty well.) I really, really, really wish we could afford to get sushi tonight, but we'll eat chili and we'll like it, dammit! Fuck...

I'd better go. I sound like my grandmother with all this complaining about shit. Jeezy...

Friday, November 03, 2006

I could just eat her up!

The fiance and I watched "The Notorious Bettie Page" last night, and would both highly recommend the film.

First of all, I cannot believe that was Gretchen Mol! I mean, I love Gretchen Mol, but it was just hard to see her inside of Bettie. It was as if we were watching Bettie herself as Bettie Page, is the thing.

Second of all, Bettie Page is adorable. If this was an accurate depiction of her, I mean, then she's adorable. She was so innocent and sweet and loveable, it hurt to watch the terrible things she had to go through, and then she went and made me a fan of bondage at the same time! (Watch it Marcus...I'm not that big of a fan...) My favorite part? When she's gagged with a ball-gag in her mouth, tethered to two posts by long strings, and left alone in the room with John Willie. John was talking to her about something, I can't remember exactly what, but he's cussing a lot as he talks to her. Bettie looks a bit distressed while he's talking, and motions to him to help her remove the gag from her mouth so she can say, "Watch your language, Mr. Willie!" Or something along those lines. Very sweet. Just so fucking adorable!

She didn't drink. She didn't smoke. She seriously didn't seem to realize just what it was that she was doing when she stripped down, put on a leather piece of something or another, and playfully pretended to spank the other woman involved in the little "pornos" they were photographing or filming. Her naive demeanor didn't annoy, but rather endeared.

And oh my holy Christ, I wish I had those boobies. SO not fair.

Anyway, I'd recommend it. Lovely little film.

Happy weekend, all. I'm getting my hair done tomorrow, watching football and cleaning the house, and looking forward to a meeting with a personnel rep on Monday from a company that I haven't had the chance to work with before (they do temp, temp-to-perm, and direct placement), so I'm glad they took an interest in my resume and I hope they can help find me the perfect new position!

Ok...buh-bye now. BUH-bye. Bye! Buh-bye...

Thursday, November 02, 2006

The Waiting Room of the World

A couple of things...

First of all, I had a dream last night that I swear lasted the entire night, but felt like it only went on for about 10 minutes. See, when I started to fall asleep, I heard a sound out in front of the house that gave me a crazy thought. (Crazy thought being that I wondered if there were people showing up on my street to walk from house to house shooting machine guns at the spots on the houses where they thought people's bedrooms were - you know, since everyone would probably be asleep by that time in our neck of the woods, thereby hitting/killing anyone that happened to be in the line of the random spray of bullets.) So, I went to sleep with this crazy thought in my head.

The dream involved me being at someone's wedding...not my own, but a friend's. I don't know anyone getting mar-

Wait a minute. Yes I do. Holy shit.

Anyway, so I'm at this wedding, and for some reason I get shot multiple times in the torso area. But it's like no one noticed it happened. I'm wandering around, trying to find my fiance, and I realize after a while that he isn't there. So I call my sister and tell her. And then I try to text my fiance to tell him, but the message keeps getting interrupted by something else happening, so I don't think I can ever actually get the message sent.

Next thing I know, I'm in a hospital room, and I'm telling everyone in the room with me that I don't know what happened, but I've just been shot multiple times in the torso. (I kept saying "torso" too...which seems weird. It's accurate, though. I wasn't shot anywhere else except my chest and my belly.) Somehow, I'm still walking around, talking normally, and actually getting a little bit peeved with people as I tend to do quite often. I can only imagine it'd be allowable especially when I've got bullets in my torso.

Finally, a nurse comes into the room. For some reason, two of my coworkers are there (the guys that sit across the hall from me, actually), and they're trying to find out how this happened to me. The nurse gives me my hospital gown and a hospital robe, and tells me to change into it. I'm in the bathroom trying to close the door to change, but the one coworker is really insistent that we figure this out, and he's not leaving me alone. Finally, I'm yelling at him, "[Coworker]!! I need to pee and get changed! Please, let's continue this when I get out of the bathroom. I need to pee! I need to pee!!"

And that's when I woke up. It was about 4:50 a.m. And guess what?

I needed to pee. Love it when that happens.

****************************************
The fiance and I were having a lovely conversation last night about magical jiz. This subject matter crosses so many lines it's not even funny, but just know that we think it might actually cure wrinkles, and people just haven't thought to test it out yet. I told him I'd call Lancome to discuss the matter just as soon as I find the proper time to do so. I won't tell you what else was discussed, since at the time I thought it might be funny to mention it, but now that I actually typed it out, I realized just what a sick fuck I am if I think it'll be funny to anyone other than me.
See. I do have the ability to filter. And you guys thought I shared too much all the time. Sillies...

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Sorry I can't go into details...

Seems like everything lately has been about my foot or my firing. Bleh. I'm tired of it. Are you tired of it? I'm tired of it...

Just an FYI, I would love to share the termination info with everyone, but feel it's a bad idea at this point. Since I'm still working for the company and am unsure of how a couple of things will be panning out money-wise, it seems stupid to go spewing info about how things went down until I'm completely safe.

Basically, though, I'm not resigning. Not unless I find another job, and all. I don't feel like being forced into resignation is fair treatment for me in this case. Not in the least. So I'm not gonna.

And...AND! Just about everyone here in the office is rallying behind me. YAY! People I didn't realize would support me are doing just that. Giving me references I didn't count on, and spreading the news about my abilities to the people they've known and worked with for years. It's a great feeling. One I want to celebrate. (Just as soon as I have a new job and can afford to do so...)

Of course, I'll be keeping everyone in the loop as things progress. The toughest thing I'm running into at this point is the question of why I'm moving on. I've never been fired before, so I don't know what to say! I think that saying that the job clearly requires someone with a lower level of experience in it (i.e. it's not challenging enough) is the best way to go. One of the references that's sending out my resume to his buddies has been telling people that the job has changed, and I'm overqualified for it at this point. That's what makes the most sense to me.

Thank goodness I've got the support of just about everyone I worked with. Which reinforces my feeling about how bogus the firing was in the first place, but again, I can't talk about it so I'll shut up now.

Later, fo sho. Maybe in a month or so.

Thanks again to everyone for their kind words to me about getting fired in the first place! You guys made me smile when I needed it the most, and I really appreciate it! I'd better get going now before this whole computer turns to mush...

p.s. the foot is turning purple and dark blue in some places at this point, and is still rather puffy, but has stopped hurting too much which is nice. I have more mobility today, and am even thinking that I can possibly get back to the gym eliptical machine by Monday maybe! Even though that might be a bit premature, and I'm planning on talking to my trainer before doing such a thing. But it's possible...we'll see! Doing upper body workouts and minor leg things make me feel better about being such a lump, but I really have a need to get some cardio in, and it's bothersome that I can't do it right now. I feel all antsy just thinking about it...