Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Ok, this has to stop...

I'm sorry...I won't be posting more posts about sex swings. I don't even LIKE sex toys, for heaven's sake! (Local bloggers/readers, take note. If you ever invite me to one of those passion party things, I will not only decline, I will vehemently and strenuously decline. I'm a big prude.) (Shut up, Twin.)

Also, Twin made some disparaging comments about midwesterners in the comments section of the sex swing post. And being an official midwesterner myself as of this point in time, I give her a hearty F.O.! on behalf of all of us. Yes, the strange people should probably take their sky swing down if they intend to show their house at all. But that's not to say that I don't see plenty of reality t.v. shows that openly declare the craziness of the random citizen of the west coast on a regular basis. Clean House? Hell-OOOO? Fucking weirdo-ass horders...

Aaanyway, I promised some pictures to some people. I'ma gon' give 'em to 'em now, oh-kaay? Alrighty...
This is the hair from the front...and I think those cheek bones sprouted overnight, seriously. Again with the missing upper lip. Very odd.
This is the hair from the side. I have some other pictures of it, but they aren't that great, either. It was hard to get a picture of it myself...fiance was at work at the time, and I didn't want to take more pics by the time he got home. I was bored with it all by then. :P

This is a shot of the 45, or so, bobby pins I had IN my hair to hold it all in place like that. Not kidding on that number. I counted 'em.
And I thought it would be fun to regale you all with shots of what the hair looked like after I took it down and shook it out (as best as one can shake out hair that has been literally plastered into place with some apparently very strong hairspray. It felt like straw. It was really ucky...

So I combed it out to calm it down, and this is what it looked like after THAT. Exciting, no?

Better than a sex swing?

Eh. Whatever. (Sickos...)

To which I say...

Um, DUH.

The world is full of idiots this morning. For fear of becoming one of them, I will retreat for a few hours now, and will emerge in a bit with fun pictchas. :D

Monday, July 30, 2007

Update to bodybugg...

Ok, so I called the tech support people, since they apparently don't wanna deal with the email I sent them yesterday afternoon.

Apparently, the reason my info wasn't being transfered to the computer (wirelessly, or through the USB direct option the do-dad gives the user) was because my bodybugg hadn't been registered.

Why wasn't it registered? Um, because that step of the process was somehow left out of the handy-dandy User Guide they provide in the box with the bodybugg I purchased! When I mentioned this to the tech guy, he blamed the lack of info on my trainer. "Your health professional should have showed you that step." Um, why? He doesn't usually go home with me, where my computer is that I'll be setting up my bodybugg to communicate my information, so why the FUCK should he be responsible for showing me the registration step?

Stupid, stupid, stupid...

My bodybugg is now registered and working. Unfortunately, everything that I've been doing for the past two days had to be erased, as registering the bodybugg apparently wipes out it's memory of all recorded info up to that point. Awesome. I entered my workout this morning manually, and I guess we'll just have to wait until next week to find out what I burn during pilates. Stupid fucking lack of info in the User Guide.

I think it might be time to send someone a letter...ta!

Even my ankles hurt!

I did pilates yesterday for the first time ever. All the rocking back and forth on my back didn't do much for me, but the leg stuff and some of the arm stuff definitely did. I'm on fire today in certain spots! Like the tops of my ankles...or better known as the front of my shin where it meets the foot, if that helps any. I can't believe how uncomfortable that spot is. And I do believe it's one of the spots on my body that actually needs the least amount of strength-training, to be honest.

Basically, I need to keep going to figure out how to get the core more involved. I feel like I should be way more sore in my belly than I am in my hamstrings, and that's not the case. So I did stuff wrong.

But that's to be expected, right? I mean, it was my first time there, after all. I will be back again. It was really a great workout. Especially for a Sunday mid-morning. Woo!

This weekend, I went in and saw my trainer again for the first time in a long time. He was transfered to the new 24 Hour Fitness they're opening in Olathe, KS, but it didn't open until this past week. I went to see the space, visit with him and get hooked up with a new food tracking system he wanted me to start using online. One that allows him to see what I enter whenever he logs in. One that also has a neat system called a "bodybugg" that I could purchase, which is used to track my caloric burn, heartrate, and measures the amount of steps I take every day. I can log on to monitor this info as well, of course, but I'm having a problem with actually getting the hardware to connect so that my bodybugg (which I have strapped to my upper right arm all day long...very attractive, I must say) can communicate with the computer and tell it what my body is doing all day long each time I sit near the wireless communicator thingy. It didn't work at home...I figured that maybe I uploaded the info wrong, for some reason. So I tried it at work, and the hardware upload is doing essentially the same thing it did to me at home.

So I'm frustrated.

The little bugg can store all info it downloads for a two week period, so I'm fine with wearing it for now so it can at least track my stuff already. But I can't SEEEE it at all, which is bugging me.

I go and see my trainer tomorrow morning, so I'm hoping he'll have some special insight into how I can get this running smoothly. Maybe we can even download the info via the computer there at the gym, so we can see how many steps I've taken in the past two days, and the fun cardio that I did today, and the painful (but still well-worth it!) pilates workout I did yesterday morning. I'm worried that my body doesn't burn as many calories as it's supposed to, according to the computer calculations the system runs by. The bodybugg should tell us, once and for all, just what the fuck is going on.

After entering one "sample" day of what I eat, though, it's frighteningly clear that I need to give up on my "I don't give a flying shit about 'low fat' stuff...it's full fat, or nothing baby!" mentality. After working out a sample menu for Friday, we noted that my diet regularly consists of anywhere from 35 - 47% fat. That includes good stuff like nuts in the trail mix I tend to snack on in the morning, and the olive oil we use to cook our dinner with now and then, but still! 47% fat??? What? The? FUCK?

I love salad dressing. I don't use a lot of it...I dip my fork in a cruet of the stuff rather than have it dumped all over my salad for me. But still...even just 1 tablespoon a day is way too much.

But I HATE...loathe, even...low-fat salad dressings. The only kind I really like is the balsamic vinegar kind, and I get tired of that pretty quickly.


I'm tired of writing about this. Tomorrow, I'll be posting pictures of the after-math that my 2nd hair trial had on my head on Saturday. THAT will be much more worth the gander, I assure you.


Ok, so I can't find the house that had the jacuzzi in the bathroom, and Nightmare, you made a very good point in the comments for that last post. Perhaps there is a therapeutic reason for the tub to be where it is. (Still seems odd, though...)

Anyway, while looking for said house, I came across another anomoly that I was hoping you guys might help explain for me. (Even if it takes more than 13 comments, we need to crack this one, please.)

Ok, so this house looks cute enough, right? Sweet facade, pretty trees...seems like a good place to check out...

Oh dear LORD! Ok, so they have a lot of stuff, it seems. And they...want to keep it all in the same room so they don't forget where it is, maybe? I dunno...

Aaaand, then you find the room with the sex swing in it. With the panda bear sitting on the lovely twin-sized bed waiting for the antics to begin, I suppose. Looks like it wants to clap it's little paws together for whomever attempts to climb into the swing for some action!

Is this to be interpreted as a therapeutic device of some sort as well? Maybe it's a fun swing for a child? Which means that the owners of the house are seriously retarded, but whatever.

Maybe I'm retarded? Is this not a sex swing? And even if it isn't, it looks remarkably similar to the ones I've seen (in shows like Sex and the City, you dirty minded readers, you), so the confusion probably isn't mine alone when touring this house, I'd think...

Anyway...um, I'm disturbed for the day. Off to get some work done now.

Friday, July 27, 2007


Just out of curiosity, why would someone have an actual jacuzzi in their bathroom? I mean, I can understand a jacuzzi TUB...we grew up in a house that had something like that, actually. But a jacuzzi that's meant to be outside? On the inside instead? Don't get it...

Non-good ideas

I don't know who came up with the idea to dry strawberries, but it wasn't a good one. Hit the drawing board one more time on dried fruit, ye fruit-dryers of the world!

Cranberries are cool.
Grapes are yummy.
Papaya? Hell yeah!
Pineapple - well, that's just my favorite right there.

But not strawberries. Nope. Blech...

No more Harps...

Something I need to practice a bit before the next meet up, apparently...

"Can I get a..."

No, wait.

"May I get a..."


"May I please have a water?"

Good God. Today might suck a teeny bit.

(Happy to have met everyone, though! Glad to have gotten you a drink, Greg, but to be honest, I don't know if the waitress ever charged me for it...she kind of didn't give me a detailed bill at the end of the evening, so it might've been on there, might not've. I do know that the new girl bought you one, though. I can't remember her name or her blog, but she was a very nice person...)

Thursday, July 26, 2007

See you tonight...

I'm going to the meet up tonight (dragging fiance along as well, you lucky so-and-so's!), so we'll catch up then, alrighty? Buh-bye...

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Because I love you all soooo much...

I feel a need to catch things up a bit. And so I will post when I can and when the whim strikes me for the next few days, I think.

For your viewing pleasure, here is a video that Rich over at fourfour posted Monday of his boyfriend washing their kitty, Winston. This makes me giggle, as it should you. If it doesn't, you have a cold, hard stone in your chest in place of a heart. And a lack of any kind of funny bone at all whatsoever, in which case I ask, whatthefuck ya doin' here in the first place? Enjoy!


Yesterday morning as I got ready for work, I saw a tease for a news item GMA would be reporting on during their first hour. Actually, they reported on it during their first 15 minutes to be exact.

Diet soda has been linked to heart risks.

Ok, is it just me, or has the news become increasingly retarded as of late? Why is this a top ten story? Why is this even a story at all?

The study has been called “inconclusive” and basically, the news is that fat people aren’t healthy. (As if that was news at all.) I guess the study leaders were sort of surprised that fat people drink diet sodas at all. Or something.

See, I was all interested in the story when they teased it, thinking that they’d found another way to give us something like the saccharine scare we had in the late 70’s and 80’s , but it’s not as though they’ve discovered that diet soda will give us heart disease. Nooooo. It’s more like people who are fat think that since they’re drinking diet soda, it makes it ok to eat that double-Whopper.

I suppose it should go without saying that people are idiots, and I don’t know how or why we should ALL be warned about something that doesn’t effect a lot of us, but this just irked me a bit. It was a major news story, for fuck’s sake! And the fact that this is a study that they did on 9,000 people, and they came up with the “findings” that yes, fat people make bad decisions about their diets in general, and it doesn’t help much if they drink soda (whether it be diet or regular) on top of a crappy diet is just such a load of bullshit to me. The dude that headed the study even said, “…it begs an explanation by people who are qualified to do studies [italics added by Faith] to understand this better.” Um, wha? Why’d you do the study in the first place if you weren’t even qualified to deal with the findings, dumbass?

It almost gets interesting when they discuss what they specifically found in those 9,000 people they “studied.” They found that, “…those who drank one or more sodas a day – diet or regular – had an increased risk of metabolic syndrome…” Now, that sounds scary until you read the next bit of info: “Metabolic syndrome is a cluster of symptoms that increase the risk for heart disease including large waistlines [like fat people have] and higher levels of blood pressure [like most fat people have, as well as some skinny ones that have high metabolisms but crappy genetics and food habits], blood sugar, cholesterol, and blood fats called triglycerides [like all fat people experience, mostly due to their shitty diets of twinkies, red meat, bacon, butter, cookies, and burritos, along with their general lack of enthusiasm about any kind of exercise at all].”

This is not meant to be a fat-bashing commentary, by any means. I love some larger people in my life, and think they are awesome. I AM a larger person, for chrissakes! I drink Diet Coke/Diet Pepsi daily, but I also make an effort to eat whole grains at every meal, stay away from fast food of any kind (except salads and sammiches made in the cafeteria here at work), eat several servings of veggies each day, and exercise at least 4 times weekly. VIGOROUSLY.

This is more of a bash on the media. Again. And their irresponsible reporting of an issue that is really a non-issue. Especially considering the guy who headed the study doesn’t even feel he’s qualified to run a study on this sort of thing. (Maybe it was poor quoting on the part of the article-writer, I dunno…)

I like my Diet Coke. Leave it the fuck alone, assholes…

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Still catching up...

Sorry for the delay on a new post. Work is a mess on Tuesdays, and it only makes it worse when I'm out the Monday and Friday before! I'll try to tell a story later...


Thursday, July 19, 2007

This day kinda sucks...

I'm getting ready to head out of town for my wedding shower in California this weekend, and work chose these last two days to literally spit-up all over me and make my life a little hellish right before I leave. Thanks work!

I'll be glad to have the time off, but I'm afraid of what I'll be coming back to next Tuesday. I'm trying not to think about it much, but it's hard. I don't know why I had to go and become all responsible like this. I'd much prefer to be a flake right now...

Last night, fiance and I went out with Lyn, who happens to be in town on business right now. It was so great to see her, and to have the time to chat and show her around a bit. I hope my tour-guide bullshit wasn't too boring to her, but I just love showing people around Kansas City when they're here! I know how obnoxious it can be, though, so I try to keep it interesting, at least. Maybe I should try going topless during certain parts of the tour now and then...hm.

Here we are enjoying our martinis at Harry's in Westport. I had myself a "Love Potion" which was very yummy, and Lyn had ordered one called "Shake Your Pom Poms!" which had pomegranate juice in it...yum!

Fiance loves Lyn...

Ok, now on to some pressing business. I had a haircut the other day, and I'm not too sure about it. I had bangs put in, but I was aiming for a completely different style than the one I wound up with...which is, essentially, the same haircut I've had for the past 6 months, but with bangs. The latest Fall preview from Vic's Secret has a section of really obnoxiously ridiculous lingerie in it, and one of the models sports an adorable cut that I would love to try. I don't care if she has legs the size of my arms, and her abs are flatter than a 2 x 4, I still think I can carry off the look because I'm as hot as she is, dammit. (I'm just 10 years older, is all. Ok, maybe 15...) Anyway, I totally forgot to take the new catalog with me to the salon, so I tried describing it to my hairdresser, it didn't go well, I wound up looking like a soccer mom, as usual, and I'll remember to take the catalog with me the next time I go. So i took some pics of it while it still looked good after being styled by my hairdresser...

Here I am being Zoolander, apparently:

Where the fuck did my upper lip go? I don't know...it disappeared at birth, I think.

And here I am as your friendly, neighborhood, soccermom (who secretly hates her children...ok, her imaginary children...whatev):

All my friends at the Moose think it's soooo cute, and it's the best hairdo I've had in the time they've known me, and way to go hairdresser! But I can't style it, of course, so it just looks like shit with bangs on me. And I hate it when that happens. (The humidity this week isn't helping much, though, I can tell ya that.)

Doesn't my makeup look faboolous, though? It took me 33 years and a few hundred bucks, but I finally figured out the fucking combo I need to make myself look "fresh" and "cute" again. Between Smashbox and Bare Escentuals (Essentials? I don't know what it's called...), I have found a perfect place that works well for me. It helps that I have a cute nose, too, though. Thank you God. Can we discuss my ass now?

I'd better run. Work is still sucky, and I need to wrap it up somehow in the next 2.5 hours. Hope everyone has a great weekend, and I'll see you next Tuesday!

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Yeah, it was my brain...but it's also MY money!

I had a bit o’ fun with my checking account at the end of last week. As I balanced everything on Thursday in preparation for the deposit of my enormously huge paycheck on Friday, I noticed that I had made a mistake the week before. When we had our party a couple of weeks ago, I thought I’d bought $53 worth of alcohol with my credit card, but I had instead used my debit card. Whoops! I didn’t put that into my checkbook register, obviously, and so I thought I had $53 more than I did.

So. I overdrafted my account for the first time since I was in college. It wasn’t a terrible offense, by any means. I figured I was going to be paid at midnight that night, and everything would wash.

Unfortunately, two charges went through that afternoon before the salary deposit was added to my account, and I overdrafted on them both. One of them was for some $8 charge at the supermarket (probably a salad and sushi lunch I had picked up…) and the other was a check for $18.30 I had written to my coworker for a charity event we’re all involved in. (We wrote a check to her, and she wrote one check to the charity instead of giving them 6 separate checks.) She had deposited the check the day before after a couple of us bugged her about waiting so long to deposit it (we had given them to her over a week before). Perfect!

I went in to balance the book again today, and saw that the bank had charged me two separate overdraft charges of $20 for my mistakes the week before. I begrudgingly added the charges to my register, and subtracted the money they took from me for my stupidity (they really should call them “Stupidity Charges” instead of overdraft fees. ‘Cause that’s what they are…) from my balance I had thought I had. Dammit.

But I’m not one to go down easy. As I said before, it’s been a loooo-hoooong time since I’ve had an issue like this. And every once in a while, even people with credit like mine make a mistake like using their debit card when they meant to use their credit card! (They look very similar to each other.)

So I called customer service to ask them to please refund my money to me, and told them it won’t happen again, and I explained what had occurred and admitted to my stupidity and said I figured it couldn’t hurt to ask them to refund me the charges, what with my record and all with them.

And sure enough, they gave me back my $40.

I am so cool, it hurts. It physically hurts. (That could be from the workout I did yesterday, but I digress...)

I always say, it never, ever hurts to at least ask. You never know when they might actually give you what you're asking for...

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Are you gonna see it?

"Spiderpig, spiderpig...does whatever a spiderpig does."

We rewind that part of the Simpsons Movie commercial over and over again, it cracks us up so much. I don't know that we'll actually go to see the movie, but I see a definite plan to rent it (i.e. Netflix, duh) in the future.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Well, THAT was interesting.

Um, no it wasn't. It's hot and humid and hot outside, so the only thing that was accomplished by my Bathing-Suit Outing today was for me to:

(a) NOT find a bathing suit.
(b) lose any and all texture that I did have in my hair this morning when I left the house, and so now it's a pile of wavy, red-colored, and blond-highlighted poo on my head.
and (c) pick up lunch before heading back to the office. My small salad from the salad bar at Hen House and an assortment of sushi of some kind is becoming wildly popular in my belly at least once a week around here. Yum.

I went to Kohl's which has previously been a place for me to shop successfully for a suit in a size that fits me, but unfortunately, this time it was not that place. The morons that work there can't even be bothered with the idea of putting the suits onto the hanger that has the proper size marked on it (Ooh! I found a 16! Oh, no...that's actually an 8, since Idiot Kohl's Worker just doesn't have the time in their precious schedule of taking clothes from the changing room and hanging them back on hangers they should be on to actually hang the clothes on the proper hangers they should be on), so it became a sweaty, useless, fruitless game of finding pieces that might be able to contain the boobies, and not ever being able to do so. I found two tops that might work, and one wasn't supportive in ANY way (although the coverage was surprisingly there for the most part) and the other had half my tits hanging out of either side of the shockingly small triangle of fabric meant to do the job.

The bottoms DID fit, though. So that was nice.

When I managed to stop one of the many, very important retail representatives they have working for them there at Kohl's to ask her where they had any bathing suits that might fit a more endowed woman such as myself, she pointed at a back wall and said, "Well, most of the suits we have in larger sizes are along that wall there..." at which point I interrupted her to point out, "You mean the ugly ones?" She just kind of stared at me. And I just said, "Yeah, I saw those. Thanks a bunch."

I mean, I know she's not the buyer for them, or whatever, and she doesn't have anything to do with what they stock for the bigger girls like myself, but still...frustration airs itself in simple ways, and I was not only frustrated, but I was hot and somewhat hungry as well. She got the short end of the proverbial stick, is all. I'm sure she'll get over it.

I did find a suit at Target yesterday, and it looks adorable and flattering and all those fun things. Except for one teeny problem. It has these little material circles in the boobs that I think are meant to keep one from showing too much nip when wet, as well as to provide...no, I think it's just the nipple thing, when I ponder it. Well, when my enormous and bulbous boobies push up against said circles of fabric lining the suit, you can see the outline of the circles on the outside of the suit.

See, this is the reason that those stupid, muthafucking circles of fabric shouldn't be USED as a lining of any kind in ANY suit at all whatsoever! Just line the whole cup with fabric and call it a day, bathing suit manufacturers! Those little fabric cricle things make no sense, and they ruin your suit on girls who are more amply endowed, such as myself. I bought the suit because I need one, and the ones I ordered from Spiegel over a month ago are on backorder until next week (and they better get sent out, goddammit, or I'm gonna start a blog specifically to spread the word on why I think Spiegel sucks) , and I'm going home this coming weekend for my wedding shower and will likely be spending a little time by the pool on Saturday and Sunday, so having a bathing suit that fits, and which also isn't about 10 years old, would be nice.

Anyway. I'm gonna check Macy's tomorrow. And then I give up.

Stupid bathing suit manufacturer idiots...

'Nough said...

I'm going out in search of a bathing suit right now. Wish me luck.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Picture Friday. Fluffy Friday. NOT Freaky Friday...

Last night, the fiance and I picked up a new toy for the dog. One that we hoped would mimick her blankey she loves and has managed not to shred to pieces, and so we hoped that she would, in turn, also not shred the new toy to pieces ASAP. It managed to survive the night, so we'll see how well it goes over the next few days.

As she and I played in bed before I kicked her out so I could actually sleep, I talked to her gently about her new toy.

Me: You love your new Fluffy, don't you? You're going to let Fluffy live for a while, I think.
Her: *squeek* [She'd managed to find the squeeker in the middle of Fluffy's belly.]
Me: Tomorrow's Friday! I'm so happy it's Friday.
Her: *snort...look at mom with Fluffy stuffed into mouth as far as it can go...squeek*
Me: Are you happy you got Fluffy? You're so spoiled! You know we love you right?
Her: *sigh*
Me: Tomorrow's Friday. Happy Friday. Fluffy Friday...

Then we played a game of hide-and-seek with Fluffy as I tried to read a few pages of my book before shutting out the light, and then I kicked her out to hang with her dad in the living room. Such a happy puppy...

So last weekend, we had a party on Saturday night. We needed to recover on Sunday from said party because we are idiots who drank too many margaritas into the wee hours. We like to take pictures when we're getting over hangovers...

Fiance had gotten his new glasses at that point. His old ones were kinda dated looking and about 5 years old, anyway. I looooove the new glasses! We went to the ever-fabulous LensCrafters in the mall on Saturday and spent a ton of time picking the right glasses out. I think we did a good job. (It's hard to buy glasses for boys! Boys are a pain in the ass...)

The dog had a puppy friend over when we had our party on Saturday, and it was the first time she's hung out with someone (a) her size, (b) her energy level, and (c) that wanted to hump her all over the place. (She's fixed, so no problemo, dude! Hump away!) On Sunday, she was exhausted, and barely moved at all. Usually, she leans on me when I'm sitting on the couch, and then when I get up, she kind of just allows her body to fall wherever it falls, and look at me with a look on her face like, "Bitch! I was using that ass!" On Sunday, she just leaned the other way when I got up. And her position cracked me up so much, I had to take a picture...

See? Bwahahahahahaha!!!

She's so awesome!

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Comforting friends

I took a detour on my way to work this morning, driving to the village to grab a bagel with hummus and tomato before I headed southwards. As I sat at the signal waiting to cross Roe, I saw a guy on his way to the intersection with his dog.

It was a normal-sized dog...looked like a dobey, but could have been a retriever of some sort, I suppose. The thing that caught my eye was that the dog appeared to be carrying something in it's mouth as it trotted alongside his master. I thought it looked a little odd, and my first thought was, "How can he pant if he's got something in his mouth like that?" Not that it mattered...if the dog didn't want to be carrying something in it's mouth, I'm sure it would have dropped it.

Anyway, I watched it as it passed, and then I was able to get a little closer as the signal had changed in my favor right after they crossed the street. The dog had a stuffed duck in it's mouth. A stuffed toy-duck, to be exact. Looked like it was supposed to mimick a dead duck that had been shot and which the dog might retrieve in the real-world retrieving moment.

And that put a smile on my face for a moment, because it was like watching Linus walk down the street in front of me with his thumb in his mouth and blankey strewn across his shoulder. I don't know if it was a training technique on the part of the master, or if it was something the dog liked to grab on the way out of the house before their jog, or what. But it was damned cute. Wish I could've gotten a picture...

The quasi-engagement photo

So I can't post any actual pictures from our engagement photo session with our photographer, due to copyright issues and all that good stuff. I'd give the link to the photog so people could look at them (and even order their own copies if they want to, although that'd be a mite creepy for anyone not related to us to do, I think), but the site lists our real names in their options, so I'll have to pass on that. Sorry...

But I do have a consolation! If you're willing to accept it.

This is a picture of my fiance and I on the day he asked me to marry him. So while it isn't exactly an official Engagement Photo, it's damned close. He was pretty drunk when we took this photo, so that's why he looks a bit woozy. I guess the food they offered to him to eat before the wedding didn't sound good to him, and then they started drinking when they were driving around taking pictures between the ceremony and the reception (there was a 2 and a half hour break in there, as I recall), and he just got toasted. Besides the fact that he was a bit freaked out about popping the question to me later, though, his friend (the groom) came up with the crazy scheme to have him catch the garter and then ask me in front of EVERYONE on the dance floor, with the mic from the DJ, instead of in the quiet, during-a-dance plan that fiance originally had for the proposal. It wound up working out perfectly, and it was such fun to be asked like that, and a total surprise to me, of course, so good job groom. :) Anyway, that's the explanation for the drunkenness.

And that's that, then! Sorry again for not being able to post other fun pics. They weren't as fun as I'd hoped they'd be, since we had to take all our pics inside due to the rainy day, and I was really hoping for a session around the Plaza and at Loose Park. (That's the park on Wornall, right? Whatever...) But they were still fun, and it gave us a chance to get to know our photographer, and for her to get to know us a bit which was nice. The photog created a little book out of 6 of the photos, which we will use as our guest book at the wedding. It's really cool, and seems like a unique idea, too. I'm so excited!

Hopefully this made everyone happy. Sorry I can't share the other ones! Sorry...so sorry. Soorrryyy...

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

It's one of THOSE posts...just to warn ya.

Oh my word…I just returned from the bathroom, where I had needed to take care of some business pretty urgently, and thank goodness it was completely empty except for me. I started praying that it would remain that way, and seriously, something had to have died in me during lunch, so I felt pretty bad about that, anyway…

But then someone did walk in just as I was finishing up. And I heard her walking, walking, walking, walking, aaallll the way over to the other end of the bathroom where my stall was…

And then I heard the *slam!* as she closed the stall door right next to mine.

I’m not kidding when I say it smelled like I had let loose a bunch of zoo animals that hadn’t been bathed in about a month in that stall. So I just said, “You MUST be joking…” and kind of laughed. And then I heard something that sounded like distant talking – you know, as if she might’ve been on her cell phone when she was in there? Which she was, because then I heard it snap shut as she ended the call…I think it was someone’s voice mail, but still. The intent was clearly there.

All I can say is that she was the type that clearly deserves to have to deal with an uncomfortably strong stench in the bathroom like she did.

I swear I will post up a sort of similar to but not quite an exact engagement photo of me and the fiancĂ© soon. I can’t do it in the same post when I talk about idiots in the bathroom, though…seems like bad luck of some sort.

Hey! A Title!

I love how my future mother-in-law thinks that my fiancĂ© and I look so genuinely happy and natural in our engagement photos, and says that’s a sign that the photog is truly able to capture personalities.

Really? Hm.

Yeah, we were totally faking. The photog told us that if we wanted the pictures to look relatively natural and “un-posed,” we should over exaggerate our expressions and our interest in each other and the stuff we were doing. So, ok then…

I know she was just paying us a compliment and all, but she just caught me on a snarky morning, is the thing. I can’t tell her this stuff, so you guys get the brunt of it. Woohoo for you!

This morning at the gym (which I was not in the mood to go to, of course) I plopped my towel down in the little resting area at the top of the elliptical, and then got moving in the program. After about 5 minutes I needed to wipe my face with my towel…and I noticed it smelled strangely like bubble gum. So I put it back and kept working out, and then needed the towel again pretty soon, and when I moved it that time, I noticed there was a little something stashed in the corner of the area I had my towel stuffed into.

Someone had put their gum into some old receipt of some sort, and then just stuck it there and left it.

So my towel had been resting up against it for, I’m not kidding, about 7 minutes before I discovered the trash (and flung it far, far away from me, dammit…BLECH!), and my towel then smelled like fucking bubblegum for the rest of my workout. Someone else’s already chewed bubblegum.

That sort of thing skeeves me out beyond most anything else. I know there are worse smells than bubblegum to have trapped in your workout towel, and all, but this really ruined my morning. While I was on the bike (which I do for 20 minutes after I’m done on the elliptical), I kept trying to hold my breath while I wiped down my face so I didn’t have to smell it. But that almost caused me to pass out after the 2nd time I did it, so I tried just breathing through my mouth after that, but then I could TASTE the bubblegum smell…it sucked large-ass donkey balls, dammit.

And effectively ruined my morning, no less. I mean, I had a good shower, and a nice relaxing get-ready-for-work time, but I was soured on the day by then. Now I just wanna get done with the day, go home and eat yummy dinner, watch Ghost Hunters and Top Chef , and go back to bed. Ugh.

I have more interesting things to talk about, really I do. But I’m afraid of what it will do to me if I write about them right now, is the thing. I don’t think I’m emotionally prepared to rant about them yet, basically. So you’ll just have to wait for more interesting info from me.

In the mean time, go check out some other blogs that are far more interesting than me. Bacon After Dark is back to posting now and then again, and is as loveable and funny as ever. Also, I found Dan from The Daily Dump at a new blog recently, so I’ve been attempting to catch up on his archives lately when I have time. It’s called [redacted]. Go check it out, if you get the chance. I’m so glad to have found him again! He doesn’t update as often as he used to on The DD, but it’s something at least. I need to add that to my roll, actually.

So, happy fucking Wednesday, everyone. Try to throw your trash into the proper receptacles for the rest of the week, if you can. You might save someone from a bad mood…

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Ok, is this no-title thing gonna be the norm from now on? Starting to piss me off!

No time to post today. Definitely tomorrow. I think...

Monday, July 09, 2007

Weird...I can't put a title on this post. Huh.

Ok, WHY do guys think it's ok to clip their nails at their desks? It's right up there with hocking a loogie into your trashcan, ok? Maybe you were raised in a barn and were taught that everything just gets covered with the hay anyway, but in case it wasn't something you'd noticed, there's no hay in the office! It's not cool, ok? Fuck!

I mean, I'm not over here painting my nails, and shit. I only whip out the file when I have a snagged nail that needs to be tended to for the time being, until I can get home and file everything accordingly. And obviously, filing my nail really only effects the carpet or trashcan directly below it, you know? Clipped nails can fly all over the fucking place, which is just not sanitary. BLECH!

On to the real post, for cryin' out loud. (Gaaww-dammit.)

Does anyone else get a really, really, really full feeling from a bottle of V8? I drink one now and then with my lunch instead of eating a salad, and I noticed that it really fills me up. So I was just wondering if it was me or if it happens to everyone. Not that it matters at all, I guess. Ok, stupid topic, so let's move on...

This morning as I got ready for work, I saw a funny little news item on the local morning show that intrigued me a bit. It seems that Sprint is opting to drop 1,000 of its customers due to their inability to satisfy said customers with their products and services. Since Sprint is a local company, I suppose that's why they're reporting this story on the local news, since I don't see it as general public-type news as of yet on the web. I only found a few stories about it, and they're all scewed stories, to say the least. (Apparently the writers of said stories are or have been customers of Sprint, and are less than pleased with their customer service history with the company. That seems like a conflict of interest sort of thing to me, but whatev...)

Here's the deal: Sprint is dropping these customers due to their inability to satisfy them. They have sent them letters explaining the situation, and telling them they have a month to find a new carrier and have their number switched over before they will inactivate their accounts. They are NOT charging them the "early termination fee" and they are apologetic for not being able to give them the services they need.

A lot of people are all gung-ho about complaining about Sprint in the stories I've found regarding the sitch. I thought it was a funny story when I saw it this morning (but unfortunately, I can't find any info on it on KMBC's website now) which is why I followed up with the research when I got to work. See, here's what struck me about the report I saw on the local news:

- The customers that are being "dumped" are extremely problematic to the company's customer service commitment. How? They are calling the customer service department 25 - 300 times per month. Now, I can understand calling once a week, maybe. So that'd be 4 calls per month...heck, I recently did it to that company that I thought jipped us on the part we needed for our umbrella that matched our little bar set for our deck. But how does one call a company's customer service department 300 times per month? Think maybe they're devoting a bit too much time to contacting them about their issues? If I had to call a company that often to get help, I think I'd go ahead and cancel my service with them. I mean, who needs that kind of aggro?

- The media thinks this is a funny thing for a company to do, particularly when they've lost some 200,000 customers during the 1st quarter of the year. (Funny thing is, the media fails to mention how many customers the company picked up during that same period. Hm.)

- Sprint has a customer base of over 53 MILLION customers at this point in time. The 1,000 customers they chose to "dump" were tying up customer service agents that can better devote their time to other customers who actually might be able to be helped when it comes to the issues they have.

I have been a Sprint customer for over 7 years now. The coverage has only improved during that time, and I didn't really have a problem with it before it started improving. (When I lived in Northern Cali in 1999, the phone didn't work in my apartment. But the only person who called me on it was my boss/bro-in-law at the time, and I didn't really need him to be able to get a hold of me at all hours, to be honest. Plus, he had my landline number, so it was his own fault for not putting that in his phone when he really needed to get a hold of me...so it wasn't ever a problem for me, per se.) Ever since I moved to KC in 1996 and my sister said something about using Sprint for long distance on her landline at home since they were a local company, I've always stuck to that line of thinking. And even though the company is based in Kansas and Virginia now (since the merger with Nextel), I still support them. Besides, like I said before, I've never had an issue with them.

Anyway, I thought it was funny that the news is as scewed as it is on the topic. Particularly when they're talking about a local company and all. I've found a couple of write-ups on the plan online, even though I can't find anything from KMBC, where I originally saw the info being reported. Here's a point of view that isn't as emotionally scewed as some others I've found. Here's the original story that popped up in my search, which I think has the most entertaining comments left by the usual conglomoration of idiots that don't know what punctuation or proper grammar and/or spelling is, thereby making their comment more illegible as well as more irrelevant.

Friday, July 06, 2007

Seeing as it IS Friday, and all...

I am currently drinking my 2nd Diet Coke in less than 4 hours. Just thought I'd warn the general Overland Park area.

I can do this sort of thing because (a) it is Friday, and tomorrow I have nothing to do but sleep in, go work out, possibly look into the tux rental stuff with the fiance at Men's Wearhouse, go to his eye appointment at Oak Park Mall at 2 (and then wander around said mall hopefully not getting sucked into the wonderful world that is Sephora while he's stuck getting his eyes looked at), pick up the last minute shit we need for the barbecue we're having at 5:30-ish tomorrow night, and then start up the fires, and (b) I like Diet Coke and if I didn't buy it, I would have gotten something infinitely worse, such as a package of Hostess gems covered in chocolate or a powdery white substance called "sugar" I believe it is.

So the Diet Coke is in me. It's workin' it's way around and makin' me all happy and shit.

That is, until my heart starts racing and I wind up driving home in a bit of traffic wishing I could FLY over all the fucking idiot freaks in front of me blocking my way.

It's a risk I'm willing to deal with. I only wish I could prepare them better for what they will encounter. Poor bastards.

You mean there are more than 6 bloggers in KC?

Ok, the mood appears to have passed. Dark cloud over Faith yesterday = sensitivity to the max. Apologies accepted, mine extended, and all is happy again. (For now...mwahahahahaha...)

I'm feeling better today. I needed to have a talk with my dad last night, and a little bit of a cry, and then some sleep in order to get back to a relatively happy place, but I'm here now. Looking forward to the weekend. Yesterday felt like the second Monday of the week, and that just didn't sit right with me. But I'll always go for a week where we have 2 days on, 1 day off, 2 days on, and then 2 days off, so I'm gonna stop complaining now.

More later. Probably about this whole Nicole Richie being pregnant thing, because, bitch says what? Jeezy chreezy...

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Just ignore this, really...

I know I'm just being sensitive here, but this kinda pissed me off. And being who I am, I thought I'd mention it here.

There was a blogger meet-up this week in the KC area. Actually, it was in the north KC area, but as there are a few bloggers that live north o' the river, it made for what was apparently an intimate and lovely gathering for the few that attended.

I, along with some other bloggers in the area, would love to join in on these meet-ups, but north of the river ones tend to be out of my normal stomping grounds boundary. I know that this goes both ways, but it's a long drive for those of us who live/work in the south JoCo area. (This can be a problem in more ways than one, by the way.) Besides, we have some perfectly fine, more centrally-located places to meet up that might be convenient for more bloggers in the KC area.

Now, I'm not saying that I think all of the meet-ups should be more centrally located by any means. Have 'em wherever, and hopefully a right mix of bloggers will show up and good times can be had by all, just like what happened this week on Monday.

But I'd prefer they get a bit more mixed-up, is all. The last one before this week's was downtown, and I was feeling pretty ill that night, as I recall. I can't honestly remember, but something kept me from going. (Possibly my old memories of past blogger meet-ups, which included Asshole at the time, and weren't all that fun for me really...) So when I heard one was gonna happen this week (didn't really find out until last Friday, which made it more difficult to plan for), I was a bit excited. But then I heard it was gonna be north of the river, and to be honest, I don't really want to go north of the river for a meet-up. Not during the week. I just know I'd get all caught up chatting, and chances are I'd like to have a drink or two, and then driving home becomes icky, and staying out later than is normal during the week, etc, etc...

Well. This is me whining about it, yes. Whining - while living (*GASP!* doing BOTH at the same time!) in JoCo!

So when I saw that there was discussion of doing this sort o' thing on a more regular basis, I thought that I might actually get to be a part of one of these meet-ups sometime soon, and yay for that!

But then I saw that they talked about having the next one in Raytown? I found this info on Heather's blog, and I commented accordingly. (My comment was as follows, for those that don't wanna go over to see: "Ok, seriously? If y'all keep scheduling meet-ups in parts of town that aren't more centrified, I'm gonna start thinking you're trying to tell me something! I'm sad I couldn't go last night. Hopefully the next one will work out better!")

When I went to visit the blog today, and caught up on the other comments that were made after my comment, I saw this response from XO: "faith - you're rich. buy gas. luv ya."

*blink blink*

Again, maybe I'm being a bit sensitive, but that seemed rather rude to me. Am I off on feeling that way? Probably...I'm off about a LOT of things. Maybe that's why blogger meet ups are being planned in areas that are on the outer edge of the suburban circle, since they know it lessens the chances of someone as hoity toity and off as me being there to share in the fun.

XO posted a report on the meet up that suggested that maybe "they" (i.e. the bloggers "who actually bothered to show up") should consider making the meet up happen at rotating locations around the metro-loop, so as to make it easier for "The Whiny Bitches" to be able to join in.

I made my suggestion for possible locations in the comments section, but who knows if my opinion will even be considered seeing as I'm rich and can buy the gas. 'Cuz that's what it's all about, really...having the fucking gas to get there, and all.

Look, I'm not trying to be a pain in the ass here. Not by any means. I've been blogging in this community for over 3 years now, and to be honest, this is the most fun it's ever been for me, now that we have this faboolous group of very interesting, funny, smart, and cool bloggers that are all around here. And it's the first time since the beginning that I'd actually like to get to know a lot of you guys in person. But we obviously all live in different parts of the city, and work in different parts of the city, and have lives going on outside the BLOG in different parts of the city.

So how 'bout you take it a little easier on those of us that don't feel like finishing off a 9-hour day at work on a Monday to drive to a completely different (and dare I say foreign-to-us) area of the city to meet people they aren't so sure even LIKE them any more anyway to hang out and drink some water before heading home to crash into bed by 9:30 so they can wake-up at 4:30 in the fucking morning the next day?

Like I said in the comments on Heather's blog, it's not about the gas. But I certainly think it might be about something else after a comment like that one...


Ok, Blogger finally came around. I wasn't sure if everyone but me could see what I was saying, or what. But now I can see the stuff, so I shall post.

You luckies.

There is currently another stand-off going on in the ladies' room here at work. I seriously do not know what is up with the bitches that do this sort of thing, but here's my deal: If I have to do something damaging when I head into the ladies' room, I will only do it if I'm alone. If I go in there, and someone else is currently in another stall, I'll just pee (I'm talented like that), and either try to slow it down so it'll last until they're gone and I can continue on with my action, or I'll finish up peeing and figure on coming back to the bathroom in about 20 minutes, at which point I hope I'll be blessed with en empty room for which to do my bidness in.

If I'm in there alone, and have already started taking care of something nasty, and someone walks in whilst it is happening, I will stop it from happening, and come back later with the hopes that it will start from where we left off during the previous visit. Usually, this doesn't go so well, so I try to keep this from happening if possible.

But I do not...I repeat, do NOT...just sit in there, silently, waiting for 5 minutes for the other person in there with me to give up and leave. THAT is fucked up.

I hope everyone had a safe and happy 4th of July. We had a mellow one. Slept in, ate some breakfast, went and worked out at around 12:45 and then had lunch after...we went to the Moose for a bit to visit with friends and I kicked the fiance's ass in a game of Silverstrike (simulated bowling for those who haven't a clue), and then we went and picked up some groceries before heading home to make dinner, lie around, and curse the re-runs. We wound up watching "Happy, Texas" instead of anything else, because...well, it was "Happy, Texas." We love that shit.

This morning, my alarm was set to go off at it's normal 4:30 and 4:40 time slots. However, it only went off during one of those time slots...or it went off during both of them, and I don't remember turning it off. Anyway, I was lying there thinking about how those 10 minutes between alarms sure did seem to be lasting a longer while than usual, so I checked the clock and sho nuff, it was actually 5:08. Having missed my window for working out, I rolled over after re-setting the alarm and got another hour and a half sleep in. Now I have to figure out how I can work out tonight, or I have to deal with the only-5-work-outs-this-week guilt, but whatev.

There are very few of us at work today...maybe 25% of the normal crew, I'd say, so things are quieter than quiet, which is how I like it. I'm using the time to fill out my thank you notes to people for the shower gifts I received last weekend, and also catching up on some much needed internet trolling-about time. Since I only usually do that...well, every other day of the week, I s'pose. But still, this is better than usual since I don't have to worry about people sneaking up on me to catch me in the middle of shopping for yet another dress, or reading the latest about Nicole Richie's reproduction action on MSN. That's always nice.

So pardon me...I have some internets to pay attention to. Happy 5th, y'all.

Blogger is still on vacation, maybe?

My comments aren't posting in my previous post. When I go to add another comment, I can see them, but otherwise, they ain't showin' up.

So I thought I'd do a quicky test post.

Testing, testing, 1, 2, 3...

Let's see if this works, eh?

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Message to the universe...

How, pray tell, can all of us normal folks get the message out to everyone in the universe that are idiotic and think it is ok to talk on their cell phone while they're in the bathroom that it is, in fact, very rude and not ok to do so?

This is much like the word "bling" (augh!) to me.

The practice needs to stop. NOW.

Is there a news story I can somehow start that will get the word out? Some sort of petition, maybe? Perhaps I should create another blog that is dedicated to the cause all on its own?

You're in the bathroom for anywhere from 1.5 minutes to possibly 10 or 15 at a time on a bad day. I think the fucking phone call can wait. Dumbass.

Monday, July 02, 2007

My chair at work has it out for me...

I keep remembering one more random fact about me that I want to share with everyone, but then I sit down in my chair at work, go to type up the story, and WHAMMO! Random fact disappears.


Today, I have a new headband I'm wearing that hurts my head and so I keep needing to take it out of my hair. Defeats the purpose, IMO.

Also, I have blown my nose so much over the past week, it is now to the official Raw and Dry Stage, and looks fantabulous. If you like red, flaky-skinned noses, that is. (I don't.)

We have hit the poor wall in our house, now that we're living on one salary and are trying to pull from the savings as little as possible. It's fun trying to figure out how we can feed ourselves for under $50 (usually that covers 3 days' worth of food...), and then going to the supermarket and buying the food and having it come in at just under $50. Like a gameshow.

Sort of.

No prizes, though.

Ok, this made me laugh the hardest so far today. Because people is stoopid. Go and watch and have fun with it.