Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Jeffers is a card.

Disclaimer: Since my Jeffers/blue ball stories are believed by some to be stories I am making up for whatever reason people want to think I'm telling them - entertainment? Fun? To fuck with people? I dunno - I just wanted to warn everyone that I'm 'bout to tell a Jeffers story. I will add that I do not have any reason to make these stories up. Nor do I care to. I'm just not that creative, honestly. I write about the actual shit that happens in my life because it's fun for me to keep a record of it, and some people actually enjoy reading it, I think.

So here's the latest that concerns Jeffers and the Blue Ball:

Sunday, I was doing laundry, as per usual. The puppies were following me all over the place as I moved about gathering the items to wash, and I was chatting with them, like I do when they hang out around me for whatever reason they do. (I think they wanted to go on a walk like we did on Saturday morning. But I had too much to do around the house on Sunday morning...so no walk.)

I noticed that Izzy was suddenly looking into the bedroom at something, and following it with her eyes. Jake noticed, too, and laid down in the bathroom door to watch whatever was in the bedroom. (For the record: nothing was in the bedroom. I was the only one home at the time.) Izzy barked, and wagged her tail. I was finished with loading the laundry, so I asked them if Jeffers wanted to play? We walked out into the living room, and I took the blue ball down from its "safe place" behind the picture of Leo's brother in the living room. I figured Jeffers was feeling frisky, and I was up for his antics while Leo was at work, so no harm, no foul.

The ball was in play all day while I hung out with the puppies. Leo came home and saw that it was out, and I told him why, and he didn't say much, so I figured it was ok with him that we were playing with it. (Again, he is very uncomfortable with what happens with the blue ball. I know it's kind of assholeish of me, but I keep hoping that the more we have the blue ball move about on its own, the more used to it he will get, and will start to loosen up about it. My plan isn't going all that well, but I can keep hoping!)

It was right before bedtime that night when I noticed it was gone. Last I remembered, I had thrown it down the hall for Izzy to run after, she went and fetched it and took it to a chair, where she laid and guarded it from Jake, and then she and Jake tousled for a bit, and forgot about the ball, and that was that. It was gone.

So we looked for it before we went to bed. Leo found a kong that had been missing for a while under the couch, but the ball wasn't there. He even had the flashlight to help him look under all the furniture. Nothing. I figured maybe I missed it when Jake carried it outside. He checked on Monday, but it wasn't anywhere in the yard, or under the deck.

Seemed like Jeffers got it!

We looked all over for it yesterday. When I got home from work, I started looking in drawers and shit, just to see if Jeffers was getting more creative with his hiding places. I looked in the fridge, the pantry, my chest of drawers in the bedroom, the closet…everywhere.

But it was nowhere to be found.

Leo was confused, and really doesn’t seem to understand what happens to the ball when Jeffers takes it. My personal opinion is that it is not on this same plane with us when Jeffers has it. When it’s moved to a windowsill or a random piece of molding on the cabinetry in the kitchen, it’s not like it’s floating through air in the hand of a ghost when it’s being placed there; rather, it’s taken to another “realm,” if you will, and then brought back to ours in its new position. For some reason, Jeffers wanted to play hide and seek yesterday with it. I even called out “olly, olly, oxen free!” at one point. But it still didn’t reappear.

Until this morning, when I was taking my vitamins after breakfast, and I noticed the blue ball in a new spot. It was in our bookcase in the living room. Behind a sliding glass door. I chuckled a fair amount, and went over to see if I wasn’t seeing things. (It looked…fuzzy…at first. I think I was catching it as it happened, to be honest.) Sure enough, there it was!

I got my camera and snapped a couple of pictures, and in both the close up shots, I caught some sort of mist-looking thing that could have been glare, but I’m not sure really. Anyway, I took a couple of far away shots, too, just to show the case I’m talking about. Here it is (in the bottom left-hand corner, next to the "Dog Bible"):

I had already opened the door to take the close-up shots, and left it open so there wouldn't be glare in the shot when I took it. But I can assure you that last night, we went to bed and that ball wasn't there. Hell, this morning as I ate breakfast (which I do while sitting on the couch, gazing across at the bookcase which is in my direct line of sight), it wasn't there. I went in to get my vitamins after I was done eating, came back out and sat down to take them, and there it was. Behind the glass. I was the only one awake and in the living room.
So, take that for what you will. I'll now share the pictures I took of the ball initially when I first opened the case to get the ball. And to be honest, when I saw this image pop up in my digital frame, I was kinda nervous to touch the ball! But then I zoomed in on the image, after gathering a bit more courage, and hell if I don't see an old man smiling at me!
That made me feel better. It was then that I picked up the ball (which felt cool, by the way...like it had been outside all night), and put it back behind the picture of Leo's brother for safe keeping until we play again. (OH! The little book it's sitting on wasn't there, either. It had also been moved. And it was set in a way so that when I picked up the blue ball, the book fell, because the ball was holding it in place. It usually is on the shelf above that one, behind a totally different door. Hahahaha!)

Can you see what I'm refering to in that picture above? If not, here...I've circled his head. I see two eyes with rather bushy white eyebrows, a nose, and a mouth in a closed-lipped smile gazing back at me. I think he has a white beard.
If you see it, great! If not, that's fine, too. It could very well be glare. I took a second picture directly after that one, and got a totally different shape in the glare/mist/whatever, but I haven't analyzed it closely yet. I could not see these things with my bare eye...only in the photos I was taking. But I had only a few minutes to upload the photos before I had to leave this morning, since it was my day for carpool driving. So I'll get the other one uploaded and looked at a bit closer later tonight.
Anyway, it's been an interesting start to the week. THIS is how I see Jeffers. A kindly, silly old man. Maybe I'm manifesting him for myself. I can't possibly know for sure. But it makes me smile, all the same.


floydfixx said...

Yes, I absolutely saw it, and thought it was a face before I read that's what you saw, too. I can't decide if it's awesome or creepy! :)

faithstwin said...

Hey! It's Jeffers! I saw it right away, too. It could be glare, but smiling glare all the same!

I don't quite understand about the book it was on though. You'll need to explain that to me verbally I think.

Sorry I couldn't help you find it- maybe because it wasn't ready to be 'found'? I even worked on it a bit last night before I went to bed and I kept getting all sorts of places you could look.

This is too funny.

flowerparts@yahoo.com said...

totally see him!

Faith said...

Mind you, that glare would have to be from the back of the bookcase, because those pictures are taken with the door slid open.

Twin, the book it's sitting on is a small phone book that I've had since high school. (Why? I don't know.) It was sitting on top of a box that holds a candle that my boss gave me one year for Admin Appreciation Day. (It's part of a set of 3. 2 of which smell funny, and are never coming out to be lit.) The book is slid out so far on the box so that it cannot sit up there without something on top of it to hold it down.

Yeah...done explaining it. Maybe I need to do a video, or something. :D

faithstwin said...

OhhHHhh. No, I get it. I was wondering why it needed the ball to stay flat the way it is in the pictures. Your explanation is good enough. I get it. No need to call. I didn't want any outside human contact today anyway. I LOVE being locked up all day with a teenager and a growing-more-hormonal-every-day 10 year old.


Erin said...

I love it.
But I don't know how I would handle it if I were in your position.

But I love it.

Nuke said...

I enjoy the Jeffers stories, a lot actually. And this was a good one. But that picture kinda weirds me out. Yesterday I kinda saw the man you described but looking today he seems kinda grumpy. The idea the picture could change (rather than my monitor sucking) gave me goosebumps.

Faith said...

Hahahaha! I think it might be a perception thing, or something. I still see the same, sweet old dude looking out at me.

I hate that it looks as distorted as it does after being uploaded. When I look at it in my camera, and just zoom in, it's perfectly clear and easily identified. Poo.

Jill Pilgrim said...

Dude, that last photo is so freaky!