Thursday, December 10, 2009

Thanks everyone!

Dad officially passed away finally this morning. I'm pretty convinced that it was just his body finally shutting down, though...I think his soul moved on a couple of days ago. (I warned Leo that he might just join Jeffers now at the house, so he'd better watch out for more activity! Not shitting you, Leo's eyes got all big and he actually looked freaked out, like I was serious. He's so cute...)

In that same vein, I've officially moved on to the silly/goofy/inappropriate comments/behavior stage of mourning. Just to warn y'all, this is completely normal for me, as well as the Twin. I think it's because of our beliefs about the human spirit, and in ghosts and other planes of activity, etc...It's also probly due to the exhaustion and mental whooping we've taken leading up to this point, too, though. So who knows?

Just know that I'm doing ok. Now it's time for me to be there for anyone in my family who is not doing ok, and to hopefully bring them some well-deserved relief from the thoughts about dad suffering for all those years, and the difficult end he experienced. Leo and I will head to California on Saturday via the Big Bus Company of the Skies, Southwest. So you KNOW there are bound to be some stories coming from that. I specifically avoid flying on Southwest, willingly paying more money for flights elsewhere, because the average person who flies Southwest is...well, they had a reality show about those people, ok? It was like a precurser to the People of Walmart site, for fuck's sake! I hate flying with those people. But! The seats are comfier than they are on American, and they fly through cities that don't tend to get snow this time of year...those are two qualifications that I just couldn't discard this time around.

Thanks again for all your kind words and thoughts throughout this week. I can't tell you all how much it's been appreciated!


Xavier Onassis said...

So sorry for your loss. Anytime you posted about your dad it was very clear just how much he meant to you.

Ms. Pants said...

Ahh, Cattle Call Airline. I hear you on that one. Ick.

As well as being your Bring-It-On soulmate in the chilly times, I am also your compadre in inappropriate comments at inappropriate times. You're shocked, I know.

One of these days, maybe I can convince you and your sis to spend a weekend with me in Houston in which there will be NO PHOTOS ALLOWED and which we will NEVER SPEAK ABOUT to people who weren't there. Because I have a feeling it would be that fun!

Logtar said...

Sorry for your loss. Hugs

Nuke said...

Well now that it is official I can give you my full condolences. I hope he is enjoying his trip! I know you aren't a hugger, but this is a virtual one so you can't stop me. Same goes for you Twin.

I am proud of you wanting to be there for family members having a tough time, cuz I know it isn't an easy time for you either.

As for inappropriate, a friend told me about a viewing he went to for his grandfather. It was apparently rather like an old school wake, with drinks and food. It seems his cousin dripped salsa on Grandad and while most were appalled, Gramma gave the kid shit for offering her late hubby dip but no chips!

You and Leo have a safe trip now.

Michelle said...

I'm sorry sorry for you are your family's loss.

Erin said...

OMG, I totally had the same Jeffers/blue ball thought!

Ah, to find a smile every day. It's important. I'm glad you're able to do that.

statia said...

I'm so sorry about your dad, Faith.
I knew it was coming, but man, it seemed so sudden.

Maybe he and Jeffers will play catch before your very eyes.

Nora said...

I totally understand about inappropriate. My aunt, dad and grandfather all passed away with in months of each other. All the services where in the same funeral home. By the time my grandfather passed, we were all a bit punchy. I got to the funeral home and asked the director if we got a discount. Buy two caskets, get one free or buy two funerals, get one half off. He was not amused. But my family all cracked up.

I wish your father well on his trip. And I wish comfort and love for you and your family. ::hugs::

Pensive Girl said...

thinkin' bout you.

faithstwin said...

Nuke: classic story- I can totally picture that situation.

I can not, however, picture hanging out around the decedent, chattin' it up with everyone, eating and drinking... that seems, ummm, weird? Yup, weird.

I want to say thanks to everyone for their thoughts, prayers and well wishes. Dad was an amazing man and will be, to put it simply, ridiculously, endlessly missed. Just the thought of never seeing him sitting at the table reading the paper again or not hearing him grumble when Faith says something outrageously embarrassing in front of Step Mom brings tears to my eyes.

One thing I haven't mentioned is Step Mom. She has said some of the most wonderful things about not only the love she had for Dad and how she does not know how she will go on without him but also her family who looked at her relationship with Dad as her protection. He was unendingly supportive even if he wouldn't make the same decision any of us would. (I mean, not like if I robbed a bank he would be all, "Well, not that I would do such a thing, but I support your decisions..." or anything.) Step Mom had only 6-7 short years with Dad. She knew early on in their relationship what he knew about his health and she made the easy decision that he was well worth the possibility that what has happened would happen. As I left today she said, "This place seems cavernous..." I looked at her and said, "I'm so sorry." I got choked up as I looked at her face and saw the tears in her eyes, knowing exactly what she meant (I felt the same way when Mom died and feel the same way now that Dad is gone). She looked at me and said, "No, I'm sorry. This must be so hard..." I just nodded, unable to talk and a second later spit out, "I love you. I'll see you tomorrow."

OK! sheesh. enough. of. this.

Ms. Pants? We may just take you on at some point! We'll play a game of how many words we can spell the British way, drink to oblivion and wake the next day to a 3 p.m. sun.

Dan said...

The inappropriate talk is a scream, and just what people need at such a time. A friend told me the best dirty joke EVER at my father's wake, and my children are eagerly looking forward to my own wake, because I've told several friends that they can tell my kids "the penguin joke" on that day.

(There are a bunch of penguin jokes - this one is worth waiting for.)

Faith said...

"As I left today she said, "This place seems cavernous..."" Ho ho! I bet she won't mind that cavernous feeling after the packed house she's gonna have this coming week, eh?

Nah, I was thinking about that last night, wondering if we were all gonna drive her buggy when we're there. But this makes me feel better about it. I hope we help a little bit!

I love all the stories you guys are telling me about your own inappropriate behavior during tough times. It's making me feel (a) much more normal, and (b) like I truly do have some very awesome friends through this blog! :D

faithstwin said...

Well Dan? You set it up- I know a good delivery is best done in person, but I kinda need to know the penguin joke now.

Ummm, yeah- it's gonna be crazy full. That is definitely an understatement.

Spyder said...

Oh hun, I'm so sorry. I just read this now (Saturday). I'm not doing a very good job keeping up on reading everyone's blog. I have tears in my eyes. Your dad held on as long as he could I'm sure. He got to see you happily married to a good man. You and all your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs

PlazaJen said...

I'm sorry, and may your travels be speedy, safe and uneventful. Love and lean on those around you as much as you need to and hang in there.

Dan said...

Faithstwin - the joke relies on a visual. Next time I see Faith, I'll share the joke, and she can share it with you!

thedirtyknitter said...

so sorry for your loss.
losing a parent sucks, as you well know. thinking of you and your family!