Monday, June 29, 2009

Confessions

1. I have had Michael Jackson songs stuck in my head since he died. Which was, what, 4 days ago now? It's getting old, tiresome, and really, really annoying. (There was a sweet hour yesterday when I had Even Flow stuck in my head instead of any Michael Jackson songs. It was a nice time.)

2. I want to take advantage of the 32 month no payment/no interest deal that Nebraska Furniture Mart is having right now, so we can buy a new fridge and a stove. But we don't really need the additional debt, or the new appliances. We just want the new appliances. We talked about it for two days before deciding it would be stupid, and moved on. ::sigh::

3. I've been looking at houses on Reece & Nichols for the last hour. Why? I. Don't. Know.

4. I feel bad that I have nothing else to write about. But instead of just rambling aimlessly about nothing, I figure it's best for everyone if I just let it go and stop trying to come up with something interesting to post about. I just am not that interesting of a person, dammit.

Friday, June 26, 2009

I don't see what all the fuss is about.

Is it so hard to believe that a girl who hasn't eaten dairy products for the past 17 years of her life has never had Ben & Jerry's ice cream? Because last night when Leo and I were at the store restocking our now-empty fridge for the end of the week, we stopped by the ice cream section. Some girlfriends of mine had been talking about some fabulously wonderful (according to them) flavors of Ben & Jerry's that they had recently, and it piqued my interest in the stuff. As I looked over the flavors and tried to decide which one to try first, Leo paced behind me saying things like, "You're opening up a window," and "I can plow right through one of those in one sitting," in a questionable tone, referring to the pints we had in front of us. I told him that's why you need to put some in a bowl, and leave the rest in the freezer. But he just kept saying, "I don't know..." I proclaimed my superiorority over him yet again, as I do not have a problem with addiction of any kind, and grabbed my choice out of the freezer. Then he reached in and grabbed his, and looked at me warily as he put it in the cart.

Hahahaha! You poor addictive types. Sucks to be you! :P

Later, after we'd finished dinner and had spent enough time pretending to not be thinking about the pints of ice cream we had in the freezer, I suggested that I was ready to try this fabled "Ben & Jerry's" stuff of legend. I thought Leo would run me down as we headed to the kitchen! (Clearly, I had been wrong all this time in thinking he enjoyed the soy ice creams we brought home as much as he had said he had.) I put some into a bowl, and headed back to the couch, and Leo did the same, and then I tried it.

Meh. It was fine. The chocolate part was really...chocolatey, I guess.

I mean, it wasn't bad, but I didn't see what all the fuss was about. (I grabbed Karamel Sutra, in case you were wondering what I decided to pop my Ben & Jerry's cherry with.)

I'm kinda sad that I didn't grab a pint of the Pure Decadence we saw at Whole Foods...they have the kind made with coconut milk that I'd been wanting to try! Maybe next week...

Anyway, am I missing something? Maybe my years without dairy have made me jaded. I have to say that my enjoyment of cheeses I haven't been able to eat in forever has been through the roof over the last few months (as is evidenced by my ASS), so I don't think it's that I just don't care about all dairy. I dunno. Maybe I grabbed the wrong kind...we'll see if some other flavor makes me freak out more in the future. I've heard amazing things about a peach/raspberry cobbler flavor that I might be interested in...

What do you guys think? Am I nuts?

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Well, that sucked.

We had something that seemed akin to a hurricane that blew through our area last night around 7-ish, and knocked out the power to our house. I waited about 5 minutes, and then I called in the outtage to the power company, and then Leo and I settled in to watch Team America on a 2 inch iPod screen with the amazing sound afforded us by the Bose docking station I bought for him for Christmas two years ago. (Srsly, worth every penny.)

My neighbor called at about 8:30 to see if we were out like he was, and I told him we were, and we were considering running an extension cord from the neighbors across the street because, as usual, they still had power while we did not. Fucking stupid grid. (They NEVER lose power, no matter what is going on. I hate them a little bit for that reason.) He had gone to the Record Bar to watch a band, but was unable to get in, so he was on his way home when the hurricane-type thingy hit. He told me a HUGE tree was down over on Nall between 71st and 72nd. I figured that might've been the culprit for our outtage, and hoped that once they cleared it, they'd get the power back on.

The power was still out at bedtime, so I called in the outtage again, and tried to get an idea of what time they expected it to be back on again, but they either stopped providing that kind of info, or they only do it in winter with ice storm outtages, because they just said they'd have it back up as soon as possible. And then I settled in for an attempt at a very hot sleep. Fortunately, some relatively cool breezes blew in after the storm moved on, and with the windows open, it was tolerable. I still didn't sleep well because I need it to be COLD for me to sleep, but I tried.

I was woken out of a sound slumber at about 12:40 a.m. by the power coming back on...oh glory be! I was so excited! And then we quickly heard a POP, and saw a flash-fla-fla-flash!, and the power was gone again. Shit...a transformer had blown, and it was close. Goddammit! I called in the outtage yet again, in case the power company thought they had restored the power successfully and were planning on moving on. (I know, they probably already knew what was up, but it makes my brain rest easier when I do shit like that, ok?)

At about 3, one of our neighbors, for some unknown, ungodly reason, decided to let one of her dogs out in the yard. Apparently, the dog was none too happy about this decision, and it was high-pitch bark/whining at her at the highest volume level its lungs would allow. Of course, as our windows were all WIDE OPEN, we could hear everything that was going on as though it were in the room with us, and this caused Jake and Izzy to bark as well, naturally. I could hear her scolding the dog as it barked back at her, and I yelled "SHUT UUUUPP!" a couple of times, but she must not've heard me over the racket her dog was producing, because she left it the fuck out there, and went inside. That dog continued on like that for another twennnty-fiiive minutes. And if you think she isn't getting a strongly-worded letter from me on behalf of her surrounding neighbors later today, you would be mistaken. Although that was pretty solid proof to me that she is, indeed, a total fucking moron, I'm going to try to help her understand what a dope she is for what she did, and warn her that in the future, I have her address, and will not hesitate to contact the police to report her for breaking the noise ordinance in our neighborhood. Fucking idiot.

At about 4 a.m., I was still up tossing and turning. I heard a truck idling nearby, and then saw flashlights bobbing about out in the yards. I went out to see what was up, and chatted with a couple of power company guys that were looking for the cause of the breakdown after they got the emergency power back up and running at 12:40 a.m. I told them what we'd seen and heard from our room, and they continued on looking for the culprit. Seems they believed a branch had fallen on a line, and it took the surge from the emergency power for it to shut down it's local transformer. They figured one had blown, but they didn't seem too pleased when I confirmed that by telling them what we'd seen and heard at 12:40-ish. I thanked them for what they were doing, and went back inside to get more rest.

And the power is still out this morning, so I shut the house up, took the dogs to daycare, and came to work to revel in the power and AC. I look super-pretty, as it is just a wonderful experience to put on makeup by the light of the glow from the rising sun in the east in the morning, as I attempt to stop myself from sweating in the ever-increasing heat of the day. It was only a sultry 76 degrees in the house when I left, but it felt warmer than that in some rooms, and seemed to make my morning shower a completely useless task to have undertaken. I guess I can hope that, even though I may be sweaty, at least it's pretty-smelling sweatiness. ::sigh::

Now I'm off to read the news on what exactly that was that blew through last night. There's a car down the street from us that was completely covered by a tree. Limbs are everywhere. We have some relatively slight tree damage, comparatively, so I'm glad for that. Hope everyone else in the metro fared as well!

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Quick note...

I just love that little Kim Jong Il guy in North Korea. He's so kooky! I was just reading the latest article on MSN about how he's named his youngest son as the chief of spies, or some shit, for the country (because giving him a title that 12 year olds would make up as they play in their parents' basement is cool!).

I saw the story earlier this morning at the gym, but it was on Fox & Friends, and therefore did not hold my attention well, as those people make me want to hang myself with the safety string on the treadmill, so all of my energy goes towards not doing that while I'm there and trapped with those dipshits in my line of vision during cardio.

As I read the story, I couldn't help but think the same thing I thought about earlier when I saw it: what about his older sons? Why were they passed up for this position? Are they not crazy enough? Are they too fucking normal?

And I got my answer in the final paragraphs of the article. Apparently, his oldest son fucked up when he was caught trying to escape to Disney in Japan 8 years ago. ::snort!::

And according to a source otherwise known as the former sushi chef for Jong Il, the middle son is considered too effeminate to be able to be the head spy, much less the possible future leader of the country!

And that, my friends, makes me laugh. Because they is ka-RAZY in North Korea. (I know, I know...as if you weren't already aware.) There just isn't any other way to put it. Fucking. Nutso.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Someone clue me in, here.

Over the last 24 hours, I've had a surprising amount of hits on this blog through searches for "TLC Uncommon Sense" or "TLC's Uncommon Sense." (Which leads the searchers to this post I wrote about the Duggars back in 2005, and I feel kinda bad because I doubt that's what they're looking for.)

I haven't heard of any TLC show based on my blog, so I'm curious, whatchoo all lookin' for? Sorry you're not finding what you set out to get! Tell me, is this a Jon & Kate thing? Because I literally despise those people, so you can go away if you're looking for shit about them. ::shudders::

Hmm...a TLC show based on my blog would be pretty cool. I wonder if I'd get to meet Stacy and Clinton if that happened...

Monday, June 22, 2009

Editorial: Based on nothing at all. I swear. Nothing.

Just a random question for those out there who like to bitch about certain things on their blogs, or who actually go to certain blogs ::eh-eh-em:: to read someone else’s bitching about certain things: Do you take that shit to heart? Or do you see it as someone basically popping off about something in order to get some frustration off their chest, much like you might do when you unload on your spouse/parents/roommates when you go home from work/school/whatever at the end of the day?

I write a LOT of nasty things on this blog. Nasty things about moms I run across that like to beat subservience into their children; or about local television stations that make (IMO) bad programming decisions; or about photographers looking for skinny brides to take pictures of to boost their online portfolios, etc, etc, eeeettttcccccc….

And dude…that was just last week alone. Let’s not even go into the last 5 years, mkay? Because that’s a can o’ whoop-ass you don’t want to unload on yourself right now, I’m sure.

That’s what I “use” this space for, though. To get my head clear. To chat about the things that are bothering me, so others can join in and chat, too, or so they can be inspired to go back to their own blogs/websites and write about shit they need to talk about to get it off their chest. It helps me keep from seething…keep from thinking about it…so that I can enjoy the commiseration, if there is any (which I did find with that mom who likes to beat her children in the name of Jesus, that’s for sure!) and move on with life and stuff. It’s nice.

I don’t censor what I feel like writing about, because I don’t feel I have anyone to answer to. I write under a pseudonym to keep myself safe on the net, but most people who know me in real life know my real name, and I have no problem with that. The pseudonym was born from a Real Life Stalking experience that occurred yeeaaarrrsss ago, and of which I’m not immensely proud (I was the one doing the stalking…hahahahaeh-em…), but it was easy to transition into this Person Who Might Not Actually Exist thanks to the existence of Faith Smith, not gonna lie.

And yeah, much of what Faith writes about is something she’s complaining about. Because that’s what she does. It’s what she’s ALWAYS done. It can be assured that complaining might have been something that was taught to Faith and The Twin while still in the womb, because they are so damned good at it. Who knows…maybe it’s because we were born last in the family, or something. Or maybe it’s because we were “spoiled” as our older siblings liked to tell us all the time when we were growing up (oh - maybe they were…complaining about it? Ahaaaa!). I dunno. All I know is that even in my current job, where I have very little to complain about aside from the water pressure in the sinks in the restroom, and the fact that I haven’t received a salary increase in my almost-three-years with the company, I’m still somehow known and teased for being a complainer. (I told my coworkers that if they don’t like my complaining now, they should have known me when I was BITCHY, too! They all got very frightened looks on their faces, and I knew at that moment that they understood they had it lucky.) So it’s just ingrained in me, is my point. If I didn’t complain here on my blog, I would literally explode on people in public. Those idiots allowing their children to use the aisles at the local Walmart Grocery as a playground? The people cutting me off from behind as though I have anything to do with the dipshit in front of me that’s going slower than the speed limit? The fucking BIRDS in my YARD that think that chirping their fool heads off at 5:30 a.m. is FUN for everyone? Yeah, they’d all be toast. Every last one of ‘em. And then I’d be in jail, and I’d be all unhappy, and I don’t want that, srsly. I don’t think anyone would.

That’s what blogs are for. And for those of you out there who were unaware of that? Well, hopefully you know after this that no harm can come from a blog. They’re just words. Words that need to be put out there so that the person thinking them can move on, and feel better about their day, and not sit and seethe over whatever particular bothersome notion might be assailing their brain that day.

And with that said, can I just mention something that has been driving me BATTY lately? One of my cube neighbors has this habit of going to meetings, and leaving his phone at his desk. And the ring-tone…it is annoying on its own. But when someone leaves a message? Ugh. It plays a repeated tone over, and over, and over, and OVER. ::gritting teeth trying to keep head from spinning:: Like those birds I hate to hear at 5:30 a.m., your fucking annoying phone message reminder makes me want to put a hatchet through your phone as it rests on your desk! Either TAKE the fucking thing with you to the meeting, or put it on SILENT, goddammit!

Thanks!

Friday, June 19, 2009

Living Dairy Free

My friend Jillian was recently diagnosed as being lactose intolerant, and being the good friend that I do so strive to be, I offered to give her some tips to being a dairy-free kinda girl.

I gave up dairy when I was 17, and had gotten the advice to do so from my older sis, who battled acne issues for most of her life like me. (Except she was able to make them go away with pregnancy. Since there's no way in hell that that is an option for me, I had to find other ways to battle my evil pores.) I had done everything up to that point, including antibiotics (which did nothing), putting Retin-A on my face (which did, at least, get rid of the scars that the cystic zits I got left on my face...too bad it couldn't keep me from getting those damned cystic zits in the first place!), and even trying Accutane as a last resort. I couldn't stand it, though, and after 2 weeks of attempting to live with what it did to my body/face, I decided I'd rather have the acne than deal with that kind of torture. (Side effects can be awful...I just had a lot of skin discomfort, drying, and redness, but it was really, really uncomfortable. Hard to describe.)

Anyway, my older sis suggested a medication that might help (aldactone, a.k.a. spironolactone), and also suggested giving up dairy, which I was perfectly happy to do. And I'm not shitting you, within 2 weeks, my skin was clear. To the point where people I met randomly - check-out clerks at the grocery store, and the like - would stop and tell me how beautiful my skin was. Let me tell you, after almost 10 years of dealing with painful, ugly, HUGE zits on my face 24/7? That was nice. Really nice.

So was giving up dairy hard for me? Not really. Just about everything you get cheese on can be done without it, and it still tastes pretty damned good. (I'm talkin' pizza, enchiladas, burgers, omelets, even the chicken nachos they have at the Moose taste good without the cheese all over them.) And you lose about 75 - 150 extra calories per serving getting rid of that cheese.

There were some things that I had to give up that were tougher - ice cream, cream cheese, and any kind of dessert made with milk, cream, or whatever dairy product you can imagine. Cheesecake has always been a favorite dessert for me, but I got used to eating sorbet, or a cobbler without the a la mode instead. Since I love fruit pies so much, that became my go-to around holidays, so I could stay away from the evils of pumpkin pie and all of it's yummy condensed milk.

Thankfully, I could still eat butter, since it's just fat, and there isn't much lactose left in it after it's been processed. Or maybe it's because it's not like one sits down to eat a whole dish of butter at a time, like you would do with ice cream, or whatever. I'm not sure. Anyway, I could eat butter without breaking out. That was nice.

After a little while, I started looking for substitutes. And in those early days, lemme tell ya, they were NOT GOOD. However, soy and rice "dairy" items have come a long way since those early days. I actually still prefer soy cheese in my grilled cheese sandwiches. Not only does it taste fine, but they only have 40 - 45 calories per slice, and only 2.5 grams of fat, none of which are saturated. And no cholesterol, since it's not an animal product, so that's nice. (This compares to the average 2% slice coming in at 50 - 60 calories per slice, and around 4 grams of fat, 2.5 of which are saturated. PLUS they have cholesterol. Yeah...bad stuff.)

Here are the products I grew used to over the last 18 years, and still use on a regular basis:

Galaxy Foods Veggie brand of cheeses - I prefer the cheddar and swiss varieties. Both can usually be found at my local supermarket chain stores.

Tofutti EVERYTHING! I love their sour cream and cream cheese (both of these come in a version that has partially hydrogenated oil in it, which is usually what's made available at major supermarket chains. I have to go to Whole Foods to get the kind without it, but it's worth the trip), and even their ice cream, although I prefer it in Tofutti Cutie form. I can't say I've ever tried their cheese. I like the Veggie brand so much, there's never been any reason to switch.

As for ice cream and yogurt, I tend to stick to the Soy/So Delicious product from Turtle Mountain. Their Purely Decadent ice cream is the kitties titties, no shitting you. It is so. good. you will NOT miss the dairy if you try it, guaranteed. My personal fave flavor is their Peanut Butter Zigzag, but Leo hates peanut butter, so he prefers their Mint Chocolate Chip, which I have to admit I love a lot, too. And I just saw that they have a version of their ice cream made with coconut milk, which I really hope I can try soon! YUM! They don't have a huge variety of yogurts available, but I love their peach and blueberry favors, so that's all I've ever needed.

I also eat the Silk brand of yogurt, and love that a lot, too. Whole Soy & Co. also makes a yogurt that I've enjoyed. To be honest, I'll usually just grab whatever's cheapest. They're all pretty tasty. Silk is our go-to for milk around the house, too. The creamer works in recipes where half & half or cream is called for, although it's not a perfect substitute, I'll admit.

Oh, I just stumbled across a whole website dedicated to people trying to go dairy free! It's here, if anyone wants to check it out: Go Dairy Free. Yay!

Alright, it's time for me to eat lunch, so I'd better run. I hope this post was helpful to some, and at least to Jillian. I can see how looking at a dairy-free life might appear daunting at first. But you'd be surprised how easy it is. Restaurants understand that a lot of people are lactose-intolerant, and they will be happy to help if you ask. (And make sure to ask if you can't tell by looking at the menu. I've had to send many a meal back and get something completely different, because restaurants think a cream sauce or something being stuffed with cheese isn't worthy of mention on the menu...) The biggest problem I've had with it is going over to peoples' houses for dinner. There's nothing like showing up to a dinner party, and only being able to eat the salad because they've made a lasagne or something with a cream sauce all over it for dinner! But I've learned to prepare people ahead of time if I can, so they know either to make something special for me, or to make a dinner that doesn't include dairy to begin with. (I'm the special one in my family's house at holidays that asks for a portion of mashed potatoes to be set aside, for example, before they add cream/milk to the bowl. It's worked out fine, for the most part...)

Let me know if you have any questions. I'm happy to help!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

What do you guys think of this?

This morning, one of my friends on the message board I belong to brought in a link to a blog, asking us all what we thought of it. I was pretty disgusted, as were all the other girls, and while I'd love to share my thoughts with the writer of the blog, she has removed all ability to comment, and any other way of reaching out to her personally, due to the feedback she received on this post about "training" her 2 year old son*. (She's put an update at the top of the post, which is stupid, but once you get past that, the original text of the post is what people responded to, apparently.)

*Apparently, she has had enough, or something, and she deleted her post. No worries...my friends and I cut and paste the post to our message board prior to her cowardly move, so here ya go!

"This has been a long afternoon for Mommy and Baby. When I got him up from his nap I said to him (like I do every day), "Say 'Hi Mommy!' " But this afternoon, instead of his usual, "Hi Mommy!" he said nothing. He refused, I mean refused, to say it.

It occurred to me that I haven't shared with you one of my favorite child training tips for babies. Here it is:

You can make a baby do things. For example, if you say, "Pick that up" and they won't do it, you can lead them to the item, take their little hand and make them pick it up.But there are four things you can NOT make a baby do.

1. Sleep
2. Eat/swallow
3. Poop/pee
4. Speak

In this case, Baby wouldn't say something that I told him to say. It wasn't like he just looked around and did something else. He was obviously disobeying me.

Like I said, I can't make him speak. But I can make him sit; I can make him open a book; I can make him come to me when called. But there is no way to make him speak. So what do I do? I'm glad you asked.

I make him miserable, absolutely miserable. At first I called the other children in and I said, "Say 'Hi Mommy' " and they would repeat, "Hi Mommy". Baby could see their example. He would say hi to them, but not to me. More proof that he is deliberately not obeying me.

Next I got out his favorite snack (he is in my arms this whole time....no opportunity to go anywhere else or be entertained). He reached for it. "Say Hi Mommy". Nothing. I would call in a couple of the little boys. I'd tell them to say it and when they did, I gave them a bit of the snack. Baby would reach for it and I would pull back. "Say 'Hi Mommy' ". It apparently wasn't worth it to him. OK, we'll figure out what is worth it.

I took him back into my room where he begged to see G&G's picture on the computer (this is one of his favorite things to do). "Say 'Hi Mommy' " Nope. Finally I sat him on my lap facing me and when I told him to say it he shook his head, no. So I got my teeny, tiny baby spanker. It's a little back scratcher that barely stings, but it's great for babies.

One little swat and he screamed. "No screaming" I'd say (in a very gentle way....I always spoke gently and calmly) and give him another little swat. When he'd stop I'd tell him again to say "Hi Mommy." Nope. Swat. Cry. Swat. This went on for about 30 minutes. I'd cradle him and rock him and he would be soothed, then I'd tell him again, "Say 'Hi Mommy.' " over and over.

Finally, when I was trying to decide if he would get dinner or not (I was actually thinking I would give him something else besides the pizza that everyone else was having because he is too young to go without a meal), he leaned his head on my shoulder and said, "Hi Mommy." and it was over.

All of the children cheered when I brought him out. He was exhausted, but he got a little snack and a special drink.

Now he's happily eating his dinner and saying "Hi Mommy" all I want.

The victory for me isn't that he will say "Hi Mommy", but that he understands that he has to do what I say. This is a lesson that will carry on into his future and keep him safe and secure. It will help to lead him to that greater relationship with our Lord. Obedience to Christ will come easier to him because of what we have taught him in these formative years.

Of course, I didn't get done what I had planned this afternoon. We had to order pizza because I couldn't make dinner. I had to set everything aside to do this. But I never wished for anything else. It was a great opportunity to spend these precious moments with my sweet boy."

(Are you sure about that last bit, Lisa? You sure it wasn't a great opportunity for you to mke your child "miserable"??? You hypocritical asshat...)

Shocking that she received any harsh commentary on that post, huh? I mean, training your children by whipping them with a small stick is so normal. Especially when its a moody two year old involved. You know, since it's what CHRIST wants her to do and all, it makes perfect sense to berate the poor thing, whip him, and spend such an inordinate amount of time on something so INANE as getting him to say "Hi Mommy" that you have to order pizza instead of being able to make dinner for your family, and shit. Absolutely perfect sense. She should get a parenting prize, for fuck's sake. ::roll eyes::

So, Lisa, since you took away peoples' abilities to respond to your fabulous little website that you tout as being one on which you write "child training tips" since you "get so many questions" about how you raise your own family from people you come across in your life, I certainly hope you find my commentary on your sorry ass. You might not feel any need to defend yourself, but strangely enough, I feel a need to defend your poor children. They are not APES. They are PEOPLE. Stop treating them like animals, you sick freak. There isn't one spot in "Scripture," as you call it, where a suggestion is made to whip your son for 30 minutes straight simply because he's probably tired, sad, or feels like going out to play with his big brother. No fucking WONDER he didn't want to say hello to you...shit, I just want to give you a swift cunt punt, myself, and I don't even have to live with your ass!

You so-called "Christians" really chap my hide. Nothing about the way you treat your children, Lisa, is "Christ like". In fact, it's the exact opposite. You go ahead and make yourself feel better by thinking that because you talk in a lowered tone of voice, and hug your children after you beat them into submission, and would never, ever spank them (um, not sure how whipping a child with a thin, light tool is super-different from a spanking, but whatever), you aren't abusing them.

But newsflash: with whatever tool you may use, woman, it's still abuse because you're using a TOOL in order to get them to submit to you!!!

Idiot.

Jeezy, I don't even like kids! I can only imagine how people who do would feel about this woman...tell me in the comments. Even if you disagree with me, let me know. You know why? Because I'm not a fucking PUSSY. I can take your criticism, if you so choose to share it. What an interesting concept, eh?

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Movie Review - Changeling

We watched "Changeling" the other night, and I thought it might be worth chatting about, since I don't really have anything else going on right now.

It starred Angelina Jolie, and included John Malkovich, although most of the other players were largely unknown to me. The story was based on a true events that occurred in 1928 - 1929. Because of that, there were a lot of times while I was watching the movie that I literally threw my hands in the air and yelled, "WHAT? What the fuck???" out of frustration and disbelief.

Leo eventually fell asleep, but just know that I don't think it had anything to do with the movie being boring...because it wasn't in the least. (He's kind of broken, is the thing, and tends to fall asleep after eating. We can't figure out why.) Also, this movie was very long...more than 2 hours long, actually...so I didn't blame him.

Aside from the length, which really was necessary I think, I can't really say there was anything wrong with the movie. Angelina Jolie looked amazing throughout, even when she was in an asylum for no fucking reason at all (lots of hands thrown in the air happened during those scenes), the story was riveting, especially considering it actually happened, and I'd somehow never heard of it even though I grew up in LA and Riverside County until I was 14. In looking at the actual events, it makes sense, I suppose...the movie makes it seem like there was a serial killing of over 15 boys at least, when in actuality, it looks like the killer was only prosecuted for the killings of 3 children. It doesn't say whether there were more that he wasn't brought to trial for, or what.

Anyway, I love a period piece, and this one was done in spades. From the cars to the costumes to the hairstyles, it was all fun to look at. It was directed by Clint Eastwood, and I think that, as per usual, he did a wonderful job.

I'd have to give this movie an A+, for sure. I highly recommend it, although I wouldn't suggest sharing it with any children under 13. It gets grisly in the middle, and I know I'd have nightmares about staying home alone if I were a kid that watched this. Just a word to the wise...

I'm also glad I didn't see it in a theater because, srsly...2.35 hours long. I'm a frequent pisser, so that wouldn't fly with me. And also, I literally could not stop myself from yelling out loud at the screen, and I doubt being in public while watching it would have stopped me from reacting that way. The 1920's was an interesting, and apparently, ridiculous time to be a woman. Fuckin' a...

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Oh, the ire...the IRE!!!

I don't know if it's because I got less sleep than I would have liked to have gotten last night, thanks to the very loud storms we had off and on in the area. Or if the universe is just pissed at me, and wants to annoy me for some reason. But this morning kinda sucked.

First of all, the local ABC affiliate news program (First News) decided that the random damage that happened in a town called Drexel in MO last night required their full attention past their regular broadcast hours. Here's the deal: this particular news station thinks highly enough of itself to have extended broadcasts every day until 9 on a different local channel, anyway. So at 7 a.m. each weekday, on the regular ABC channel, it usually switches over to Good Morning America, which works for me because I like watching national/international news while I finish getting ready, and before I head out the door at about 7:30.

But if people want more local news to be repeated over and over and over again, or they wake up late, and are just seeing it for the first time starting at 7 a.m., then they can switch over to a different channel, and watch continued local coverage from the local ABC affiliate from 7 until 9.

So this morning, when they decided to continue with the coverage on Drexel, which has a total of 1100 residents, mind you, and it was determined that all of them were ok after the storms moved through last night anyway, I didn't really understand. I was pissed, and wanted to watch GMA, goddammit. So I switched to ::shudder:: NBC, and then I sent an email via my Blackberry to the station to let them know I thought they were being dopey. "All due respect to the folks in Drexel, but the storm damage that occurred there over night isn't too interesting to me after the initial reports about the straight-line wind damage, and hearing the fact that everyone in town appears to be ok. If it was, I could switch over to KCWE to watch continued coverage.

But I, for one, am interested in national news now, thanks. I'd like to watch Good Morning America. This continued coverage on KMBC is unneccessary and excessive. Thanks for basically forcing me to switch to NBC. Ugh."

I immediately received an Out of Office reply from the person who apparently receives emails from viewers. Awesome. So I went ahead and called the station instead. The kid I talked to sounded really concerned about losing viewers due to their decision to focus on Drexel being knocked about a bit by straight-line winds last night, during which no one died. [/sarcasm] Yep. Thanks a bunch, KMBC. You guys are faaaabulous. (He was nice, and all, I guess. And I was even really toned down on the bitch-meter! Believe me, I was downright pleasant. No cussing, or anything. But his response of, "Ok, I'll let them know..." just didn't do it for me, dammit. Hence the reason for this post. I feel a bit better now, really...)

And then, to top things off, on the last stretch of my drive into work, I was stuck behind a person who thought they needed to stop like they were at a stop light/stop sign at every intersection, even though they had a green light, and then they did have a stop sign, but whatever...they stopped for like 10 seconds even though no one else was at the intersection, and then they stopped at the yield sign even though, again, no one was there to yield to, and then they full-on stopped at the next intersection that we were both turning right at even though THERE WASN'T A FUCKING STOP SIGN! Gah! Learn to drive!!!

I'm hoping the day gets better. It's feeling like it is. So we'll see...

Monday, June 15, 2009

Oops. My bad.

Note to self: June has a tendency to be a swamp-assy kind of month in Kansas. Since you always have your annual gynecology exam in June, it is important to remember that swamp-assy issue, and schedule it accordingly.

A 4:15 p.m. appointment on a 72% humidity, 80 degree day is probably a bad idea.

Note to nurse practitioner: I'm so sorry. I hope my vag isn't the worst one you have to look at today. A thousand apologies if it is!

Friday, June 12, 2009

Asian Market in Downtown KC?

Local people, help me out here...there's apparently a really great Asian market downtown here in KC, but I have no idea what it's called or where it's at. Anyone know what I'm talking about? I need produce and possibly some beef short ribs from there...

Where the hell is it?

Tomorrow.


June 13, 2009 marks the 11th anniversary of my mom's death. For those who don't already know, my mom passed away from colon cancer that had metastacized to her liver when she was 53. She died on Saturday, June 13, 2008. I always find it significant when her deathiversary (which is what I call it) falls on the same actual day of the week that she died. Because I'm weird like that.


All this week, I've been noticing the 11:11 mark more frequently than usual on the digital clocks around me, so that's nice. I wrote a post about this a long time ago, when I found out that I wasn't the only one that found meaning behind the 11:11 mark on the digital clock, and then wound up googling it to find out that LOADS of people find significance behind the 11:11 mark on a digital clock. This didn't make me feel any less special. In fact, it had the opposite effect because I hadn't ever heard of anyone else feeling a level of significance with 11:11. I thought it was my thing that my mom had given me. But you can read more about it here, or here, or here, if you want to. I just started saying hello to her one day in 2001 when I saw the 11:11 mark on the clock. I didn't know why I did it, but it just seemed like the right thing to do. I'd see that it was 11:11, and I'd say, "Oh, hi mom!" and have a little conversation with her in my head about how things were going. I'd ask her if Dan was doing ok, and then I'd move on with my day, as I assumed she did with hers. I believe it was Ms. Pants that posted something about the 11:11 phenomenon once, sometime in 2005, or something. I can't remember. But that was where I found out that there was a reason why I was doing what I'd been doing for all those years...I just didn't know it.


So anyway, mom's been saying hello a lot this week...at least 3 times. To the point where it makes me giggle to see it again when I see it on the computer, or on the bedside clock, or in my car.


I love my mom a lot. It sucks that she had to die as young as she did, but I'm grateful for the continued presence she blesses me with in my life.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Summer T.V. kicking in...finally!

Look, it should be no secret to any regular reader of this blog that Leo and I have a favorite nightly activity. And that activity is to sit on our asses and watch t.v. What can I say? I was raised in a home that had no bounds when it came to television watching, and Leo was raised in a home that had so many restrictions on t.v. watching when he was a child, he had to sneak over to a neighbor's house just to watch reruns of Andy Griffith. (Referencing The Cosby Show or Growing Pains/Family Ties/Sesame Street is completely lost on him...which pisses me off a lil' bit, not gonna lie.) So I was basically conditioned to be a t.v. junky from age 3 on, while his restriction from the bewb tewb kind of set him up for being addicted to everything he was able to watch once he was allowed to watch it.


Anyway, we both like our television, is what I'm trying to say.


The transition from Spring to Summer t.v. can be brutal. All the good shows (30 Rock, Psych, My Boys) are in hiatus, and this year, there hasn't really been anything to soften the blow for us during that transition time. ANTM ("America's Next Top Model") finished its last cycle in March or April, Top Chef won't be back until Fall, I'd guess, and stupid fucking Lifetime wasn't able to secure the rights to release the new cycle for Project Runway until August, so that sucks ass.


Fortunately, I'm enjoying the replacement show on Bravo called "The Fashion Show." Leo finds Isaac Mizrahi to be uber-annoying (and let's be honest...who doesn't?), but I like the "cast" and the format, so I'm enjoying it in spite of Isaac's annoying whining and condescending commentary.


And then last night was the premier of Top Chef Masters, which is a brilliant in-between placement for the standard Top Chef cycles. I'm going to go out on a limb here, and call Hubert for the win on the entire shebang. (A) I love him, and (b) if he can make such an amazing-looking 3 course meal in a 10 x 12 dorm room (along with the help of the bathroom down the hall...) I cannot wait to see what he contributes to the Championship Round. Woohoo! (If you don't know what I'm talking about, you missed some prime foodie t.v. entertainment, and you need to Tivo a rerun, dammit. Dude put a college dorm shower head into a collander filled with pasta to cool it and then heat it back up again for his Mac & Cheese with Prawns dish, and it was the dish that basically what won the judges over. I think they might have reconsidered had they seen that he didn't just spray the water on the pasta, but actually plunged the shower head into the pasta...)


And then there's the 4th season of Kathy Griffin's "My Life on the D List" that started. I know a lot of people don't like her, but we do, so nyah.


Not to mention that a new season of one of the ghost hunter shows I watch started up last week on The Travel Channel, too. (Alisha, did you notice that? "Ghost Adventures" started back up again last week. It was an...interesting episode. It wasn't the greatest, but I'm not complaining, really!)


Anyway, Leo was insistent that I post about Hubert's mac & cheese creation via the grubby shower head, and I figured I'd take the post one step further and discuss all the t.v. we're watching right now. Not to mention the shows we're watching on DVD through Netflix...Weeds, Mad Men, just finished Alias and wondering what to do with ourselves, Leo went ahead and started us on Big Love. Which I'm not enjoying all that much, actually. The story of the father-in-law who's in charge of the polygamist compound that one of the wives came from is interesting, I suppose. But the whininess and the chaos of the 3 wives combined with Bill Paxton (I saw his BALLS in the pilot. Bill Paxton's balls. Nononononononono...) is enough to turn me off, and we're only on the 2nd disc of the 1st season. So I don't know how much longer I'm bound to last on it, to be frank.


So there ya have it. Thursday at it's finest.


Man, I'm bored...

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

That sounds like a bad plan, but what do I know?

So I was making the rounds on the local Craig's List yesterday during a particularly boring Monday afternoon...I had initially gone out there to look at the restaurant jobs available, to see if anything interesting had popped up that might be fun for Leo to look at. I wound up looking in the "talent gigs" to see if there were any random voice over ads up, and found this instead:

"Professionally trained, female photographer seeks attractive women under 180 lbs. for creative bridal shoots to build her photography portfolio. Shoots will be on location, which means, you can't be worried about getting your dress a little dirty. This is probably best suited for a post-wedding bride who was disappointed with her pictures or couldn't afford exclusive bridal pictures at the time. Or a gal who just wants to wear her wedding dress and be a diva again for a day! These will be very creative, professional quality images you can keep. I can't provide $, but will give 1 8x10 print of your choice and a CD of selected images for your personal use. YOU MUST SIGN A MODEL RELEASE. Please send me a snapshot of yourself."
[Bolded section was my emphasis...]

First of all, if I could still fit into my wedding dress, I'd totally submit myself in a serious way and see what this chick would do. But I don't...I've gained a good 15 pounds since the wedding, and getting into that dress would be a miracle right now.

But I weighed 184 on my wedding day. And didn't I look HEINOUS??? ::gasp!!:: Look away for your own good, goddammit! SAVE YOURSELVES!
I hate that I had to do that to you guys, really.

::exasperated sigh::

So I've been discussing this with my friends, because sometimes I behave with what I call a "reverse fat-prejudice" in my life, and I get all offended at what might seem perfectly reasonable to lots of people.


But it turns out that the majority of my friends agree with me. One of them putting it succinctly and very wisely saying, "A talented photog is going to make ANY woman look beautiful." Which I fully agree with, and now I wanna respond to this ad as such.


What do you guys think? Because I get that this chick wants to have a nice portfolio...I really do. But like I said to my friends, "...personally? As a plus-sized girl/bride/what have you? I want to see diversity in someone's portfolio when I'm checking them out. When I see nothing but thin, obviously pretty people, I take issue with it." Maybe that's just me, though...

Monday, June 08, 2009

Yes! Or no!

I can't imagine being one of those girls who either always wears pants or always wears skirts. I need both in my life. Some days feel like pant days, and some days I wanna be all girly, so I throw on a skirt or a dress.

But I can't say there isn't a part of me that doesn't wish I could be a "uniform" type. You know, one of those chicks that wears a similar outfit every day, but varies the shirt color, or the pant color, or whatever...

One thing you can be damned sure of: I will never, ever be the type of woman that wears cropped pants. (And, word to the wise, unless you're 5'8" tall, you shouldn't be that type of woman either. ::shaking head:: Nuh-uh.)

I'm at a crossroads. And I literally got about 1.5 - 2 hours of sleep last night. (Not really anything to do with the storms in the area, shockingly. I fell asleep at midnight, then Leo came to bed at about 12:30, and I was wide awake again. I almost felt like it was 10 in the morning, I was so fucking awake. It was very odd.) So I'm off to shop for storage solutions for the garage at Target now. Because that's how I like to deal with lack o' sleep hangovers...

Friday, June 05, 2009

::shaking head::

I guess that growing up as the twin of a diabetic has made me ultra-sensitive to stories I hear about diabetic shock going ignored, or about how diabetics are still, somehow, misunderstood in this day and age. After all, I've had almost 30 years of very close 2nd hand exposure to everything from insulin to blood tests to even a pretty severe case of ketoacidosis.

So seeing this story on MSN today kind of broke my heart.




No one died. No one even came close. But the fact that the child involved was accused of stealing, and sent to the principal's office and received punishment for trying to avoid a possible reaction to a dangerously low blood sugar content is sad to me. Maybe she doesn't wear a bracelette or a necklace that indicate her diabetic status. Maybe her parents need to make more of an effort to make sure the proper individuals (the principal, the kitchen crew in the cafeteria, her teachers, etc...) are aware of their daughter's condition...I dunno.

It just makes me sad. Because, yet again, diabetes is overlooked. And this child will live a lifetime dealing with that happening over and over again unless we find a cure, goddammit. From the ADA website, "There are 23.6 million children and adults in the United States, or 7.8% of the population, who have diabetes...It is estimated that 5-10% of Americans who are diagnosed with diabetes have type 1 diabetes." Over 100 million people worldwide have diabetes. We should know more about it than we do, dammit.

I'm in a foul mood this week. Here's the hoping the weekend clears it up.

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Hahahahaha! And other assorted bits...

I've spent a fair amount of the morning over at this web site looking around, laughing, trying not to piss my pants, etc, etc...after I read a recent posting that had been copied to a work blog.

If you do nothing else all day, at least read that post. Seriously.

And now I'm going to get my lunch.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Just a quick question...

Yesterday, Leo and I were talking about the dinner he was throwing into the crockpot before he headed out for a dentist appointment. He said we had a LOT of chicken, and wanted to know how much of the food I wanted to have left over. I like leftovers, so I told him to throw it all in there, goddammit. (We had bought 3 breasts and 4 drumsticks for this particular meal.) He suggested putting in 2 breasts and two "drummies." I ignored that and said, "Put in whatever will fit ok. I'd like to have at least one drumstick tonight, so make sure there's one in there for me." He again said that he'd put in 2 breasts and 2 "drummies," and the crock pot was pretty full from that.

I finally asked him why he kept calling them drummies. He said because that's what they're called. I said, yes, by gay 12 year olds and their moms, maybe. And he responded that he actually wondered how many times he could say "breasts" in the conversation, because he was getting turned on.

::sigh::

I told him they are drumSTICKS and that I would extend the question to the internet on his behalf in order to figure it out for good.

So, what do you call that part of the chicken, folks? Drumsticks? "Drummies?" Do you just call them "legs" all the time, or do you realize that's the inappropriate term for the drumstick since the drumstick technically (a) isn't a leg, and (b) well...that's all really. It's not a damned leg, so yeah. What say you?

Monday, June 01, 2009

No rain, no rainbows...

Starting off this post with the information that Jillian had a much more interesting Sunday than I did. Go read about it at The Pilgrim Congress, will you? She really does love a shit show...

Now, what video to share today? Which one, which ooonnnne. Hm. It's a toss up between Frente's "Labor of Love" and Fiona Apple's "Waltz - better than fine." In listening to them both, I'm going with "Waltz". Because I sound like a tool when I sing along with Frente, as it turns out. Interesting. (Why do I immitate the accent? Is she even supposed to have an accent??? Isn't she from LA? I don't get it.) Enjoy! This is a short one...just a clip of the song that lasts less than a minute, and I like the way I sound singing it, dammit.