Tuesday, September 28, 2010

I'm just sayin'...if those were MY initials? I wouldn't use them to sign emails.

I woke up on the absolute, 100%, certifiable WRONG SIDE of the bed this morning.

Actually, it seemed ok, at first. I snuggled with Jake-Jake, and managed to pull myself away without too much time getting away from me, so I could get in the bathroom and change into workout clothes. But as I was changing, I heard Leo make one of his super-loud, obnoxious wake up noises that he's started doing since he began taking Lunesta. He was having sleeping problems. Poor guy. (/sarcasm) Now that he takes Lunesta, apparently I get to have all the sleeping problems. Namely having to get up with the dogs in the middle of the night when they ate dinner too late, and/or being awoken with a LOUD *YAAAAWWWNNNN* at 6:45 a.m. on a day when I get to finally fucking sleep in. He doesn't just wake up anymore. He wakes up WITH NOISE. You know, in case I hadn't already made that clear enough.

I generally have a hard time getting back to sleep after getting startled out of a deep slumber, so on Saturday, after The Great Yawn of 6:45 A.M., I tried to go back to sleep, but I couldn't. He'd also gotten up and gone into the office and shut the door, leaving the now awake and very excited to go outside dogs to dance around my side of the motherfucking bed all expectant-like and hyper, until I finally just got the fuck up, and let them out.

Assholes. The lot of them...ASS. HOLES.

I mean, I love them all, of course. But still...GOD.

So anyway...this morning. I hear the Wake Up Noise from the bedroom as I was putting in my contacts, and next thing I know, Leo is standing in the bathroom door, scratching himself and looking all awake, and shit. And I'm like, "The fuck? Go away." (I really, really like my alone time in the morning, especially when it begins at 4-fucking-30 a.m.) So he went away, but only into the closet to put on clothes, and I finished getting ready and headed in to get my flipflops (which is what I wear to the living room, where I put on my workout shoes...it's a routine. I don't like to fuck with the routine...), and run into Leo who is standing and staring at his shirts. Apparently pondering which one he'd like to wear today. So I say, "MOVE." I mean, really, why does he mess with The Beast that early in the day, anyway? I don't even like The Beast! I certainly didn't want it woken up like that, dammit! He moved, and I got my flipflops on, and headed out of the damned closet to the living room. Where my workout shoes were no longer hanging out waiting for me. UGH! Leo moved them into the closet on Sunday when he vacuumed! I mean, yay! for the vacuuming! I'm a very lucky bitch, etc, etc,...but still, why can't he leave my workout shoes alooone? That is where they are kept. Under the right hand side of the coffee table. Waiting for my fat ass to put them on and use them. Don't. Touch. Them.

So I head back into the bedroom to get my shoes out of the closet, and there's Leo, sitting on the edge of the bathtub surround, putting on socks. He already had on one of the new sweaters we picked up from Macy's last weekend (ridiculously good sale over the weekend...it was INSANE) and his jeans and everything, and now he was putting on socks, and I was all, "It's FOUR FORTY FIVE. Why are you even UP?" He couldn't sleep anymore, he said. "You didn't even try. You made your crazy yawn noise, and just got up right away! Why not roll over and sleep some more if you don't have to be anywhere until 9???" He did try, he says. He wasn't tired anymore. All of this is said with a fucking GRIN on his face. UGH! Ugh, ugh, uuuggghhh!!!

Mind you, I HAVE TO get up at 4:30 to get to the gym before I go to work every day. (Well, not every day. Just on the days I decide to do it. But you know what I mean....if I wanna go to the gym, I have to get up at 4:30 to do it.) He doesn't have to workout until 2 or 3 today, because that's when he sees his trainer. Prior to that, he gets to hang out around the house, and do homework, and he was having some stitches removed at the dermatologist this morning, so that was what the early appointment was about.

Anyway, it just pissed me off, apparently. And the day just keeps chipping away at me ever since. And even stories of shittier days aren't helping me much, so you KNOW I'm in a pretty deep funk, if that's the case.

Maybe a walk will help. ::sigh:: I'll try that...so pretty out...

Anyway, I got an email today from someone who's not even on my team asking me for something they should get from their own admin, but none of that really matters. Because this person signs her emails with her initials. Which happen to be "BSC". You just tell me...is that how YOU would sign your emails if those were your initials? Think I should give her the link to the Urban Dictionary definition of "BSC"? Shit, work doesn't even allow us access to the Urban Dictionary! So I guess that passive-aggressive route is out.

I should totally be signing all my emails with those initials today, I guess! Maybe she wouldn't mind if I borrowed them...


Nuke said...

I tried to comment, twice, just now. Getting error 503 (not sure this will go thru).

And I was fucking hilarious.

Faith said...

Grrrr! What's with all the errors lately? BOOOOO!

And I bet you were hilarious. I'm sorry blogger decided to censor your funny butt. That just pisses me off MORE!

Ms. Pants said...

I had to look up BSC. I kept thinking "Big Stupid Cunt." Close enough, I guess.

Also, I would murder your husband for his yawn noise. DO NOT POKE (OR MAKE STUPID FUCKING LOUD NOISES NEAR) THE BEAR!!!

Faith said...

My boss didn't know what it meant, either. So I had to tell him. He said it was fitting! Hahahaha!

Why did I think that BSC was a more standard acronym? I think I picked it up when I was hanging around the message board at The Knot. Which would make sense...

faithstwin said...

WTF does BSC stand for? I don't want to go look it up. You should have just parenthasized it for me.

Sorry Leo is an oddball. Lunesta, huh? I know they warn you about not driving heavy machinery and shit but do they warn you about crazy emereffing sounds coming from your mouth? Lawsuit!

faithstwin said...

Oh and Nuke- that happens to me almost every time (because Blogger fucking hates me...it got me fired from a great job and everything.) I just click on the little broken page next to the 'lock' symbol and my comment pops up.

Faith said...

Bat shit crazy.

How do more people not know about this acronym??? ::scratching head::

faithstwin said...

Maybe I am just bad at it- I pretty much only change my 'What The Fuck?' to the actual 'WTF' when I am in mixed company. Everything else can be adjusted without using acronyms, is all.

And I don't tend to use the 'bat shit crazy' ever.

Nuke said...

I had to look it up. Thought when you referred us to Urban Dictionary it was gonna be as epic as RCG.

Faith said...

Well, sheeeiiit.

Big ol' FAIL on me, eh? :D

Ok, but what the hell does RCG stand for??? Dammit, Nuke! :P

faithstwin said...

Nuke, you did that on purpose, man. I looked it up and it could mean a LOT of stuff... 'Reverse CowGirl''Relatively Cute Girl''Random Creepy Guy' (My fav)= 'Retarded Chicken Gang'.


Nuke said...

Fuckin error 503 again.

Anyway I meant Reverse CowFirl, tho I love Retarded Chicken Gang!