Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Because *mine* was licked on by kittens!

I've been trying to convince Leo for a few weeks now that he should give acupuncture a try. At first he was resistant, because Leo + needles = FREAKTHEFUCKOUT. But then he started to seem agreeable about the idea.

And then over the weekend, we were talking more about him needing to go to the doctor to get an updated prescription for his blood pressure meds, and I was all, "DUDE. Please try acupuncture!" And he agreed that it might be a worth-while idea.

So I offered to make him an appointment while I was in their office on Monday for my own appointment. He agreed that would be a good plan. We talked about when would be a good time for him to go in this week, but if they didn't have any appointments, then what about next week? Got it all nailed down. So I went in on Monday, got there a little early, made his appointment for today, and gathered the paperwork for him to fill out at home so it'd be ready to go when he goes there today.

I got home and found him in the closet, ironing. Because that's something he's been needing to catch up on, apparently. And I told him I'd made his appointment, but it was with the new accupuncturist, Amy, because my doctor is a pretty busy dude, and Amy is really nice and very qualified.

"Whoah, whoah! ACUPUNCTURE? I didn't think I was getting acupuncture!" he replied.

I literally cocked my head at him and said, "What the hell did you think we were talking about for the last couple of weeks, dude?"

"I thought there were other ways they could help me. Like through chiropractic stuff, or whatever?"

"Well, maybe. But the reason why the chiro is working for me, along with acupuncture, is because my eye twitch is connected to nerves in my neck that are all wonky. I don't think they'll be able to tie your high blood pressure to wonky nerves in your neck, hon. But you never know!"

"I don't WANT acupuncture tomorrow!"

"Oh! Well, it's just a consultation tomorrow, though. So you can sit down, tell them you have this insane aversion to needles (even ones you can't feel), and see what your options are! No biggy! Or you can eventually do what I do when I'm in there...and just shut your eyes. You aren't the one putting the needles in. So you totally just get to lie there with your eyes closed! Also, Amy's really pretty..."

And then he muttered something about me being a smartass, and I went out to watch TV until dinner was ready.

I hope his appointment goes ok. I just cannot understand why his damned blood pressure is still so high even with working out regularly, and eating well, and not being a chef anymore...It's a head-scratcher!*

*Yeah, no it's not. Dude has to live with me. Mystery solved.


faithstwin said...

aahahahaa- I was all, "Well, maybe it has something to do with the fact he lives with you...

Then I got to the end.

Can't you get him those meds that he uses for the dentist that fuck with his head so he doesn't even know where he's at?

"This guy is so stupid... it's Count Rushmore!"

Faith said...

You should have heard the high pitched screamy noises he was making last night just talking about the needles. Apparently, it doesn't matter that they aren't injecting anything, or sucking anything out...he just is like a 2 year old about fucking needles.

Which is FINE. I totally understand that there are a lot of people who have a fear of needles in this world, and it sucks to be scared of them.

But it is hard for me to make sense of it because they are so not scary. They don't hurt, unless you accidentally bang one into the wall you're lying next to while you're supposed to be lying still (yeah, it happens), or whatever. And I bleed now and then because I'm a bleeder. It's just what I do. He not only hates needles, but is so grossed out by blood, he almost vomits and faints.

He's still thinking about it, though. I'm telling him that this can totally help him get over his fear of needles, if he gives it a chance. We'll see if that method works at all.