Wednesday, February 13, 2013

My midlife crisis might have already expired. So I don't know WHAT the hell this is.

I'm struggling a little bit, you guys. I feel slightly unfullfilled lately. Like I'm not doing what I should be doing. Like I'm wasting away my life in mediocreville, and I just need to put in a little effort to find my way to a more meaningful existence.

This doesn't happen to me often. I'm actually usually pretty ok with being at C level in life. Getting along and not bothering anyone as I do it.

I think it might be that I just had another birthday. That in and of itself doesn't bother me in any way. I don't care about getting older; I welcome it. But I think it's that whole milestone thing that makes it significant to my psyche in some way.

It could also be because the Twin is starting up another business in her town, and I'm jealous of her gumption and ballsiness when it comes to this whole starting-a-business thing. I would LOVE to do that type of thing! But...AUGH!!! ::runs screaming from the pressure, responsibility, and hard work::

And I mean "jealous" in a good way. I think her business idea is awesome. Maybe in the future, if it's doing as well as I feel it might, we can look at opening a branch of it here in Kansas. Maayybeee...

;)

So I'm sitting here thinking that I want to quit my job (which I love, by the way...which is what makes it so hard to even consider quitting!) so I can give myself the kick in the pants that I need to have in order to get moving on things.

I want to buy a house and rent it out.

I want to work as a stager, so I can help people sell their houses quicker. (Not that it's that easy, of course. People have a history, in my experience, of not listening very well, even when they went in search of help in the first place.)

I want to open a furniture store, so I can have stock to choose from for the staging. (And also so I can BUY ALL THE FURNITURES!)

I basically want to make a whole new set of rules for my life, but without losing my medical benefits, and other small benefits that I get through my workplace. Is there a way to do that? Can I just come in here, like, 10 hours a week so I can get my fill of coworker banter, and qualify as an employee so I can maintain the small benefits I get for myself and my family?

What if I say "please"?

::sigh::

I'm in a rut.

1 comment:

faithstwin said...

Maybe go talk to a life coach? Or find a volunteer program? I know it won't give you benefits but it will hook you up with people every week if you want it to. (Hospitals need friendly people at their info desks or to help check in little kids for surgeries... catholic schools need people to help with all kinds of stuff every day, etc) Otherwise, wait until my biz kicks off the way I know it will (give me until August, or maybe next Fall) and we can look into opening one there. That would be so epic! I could start referring to mine as The Flagship Store. OOOOOoOooOooooo!!!