Since I've been weaning off the Propranolol, I've noticed the side effects of the meds a bit more. This is the 4th week that I've been working myself off of the meds, and I'm officially one day on/one day off at this point. Yesterday: no dose at all. Today: one dose of 80 mgs tonight before bed. I had been taking it in the mornings, but I think that exacerbated the side effects I was feeling. (It causes dizziness, excessive tiredness, stomach issues, etc...)
I had a fucking GREAT workout on Tuesday this week, during which I got my heart rate up to 161. ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY ONE, BITCHES! It was FABULOUS. My average during that workout was 122, which has been unheard of for several years.
But. After the workout was over, and we were driving home, I almost thought I was gonna have to roll down my window to throw up. Fortunately, some slow breathing and happy place thoughts saved me from that mess, but still. It freaked me out.
I've had monumentally better workouts these past couple weeks, though, so I'm trying to focus on that magic of it all. I've been tired, though, so I've taken a lot more off days than I had been for a bit. Thursday and Friday this week were off days. Today was a better workout, though. Maintaining an average heart rate of 124 for almost 40 minutes, and reaching a peak of 141. I'm burning more calories in less time, and that is exactly what my goal is, folks.
I can't wait until I'm 100% off the drug. I'm giving it another week of one day on/one day off, and then I'll do a couple weeks of one day on/two days off, and we'll see how that goes.
I'm getting very mild, low-level headaches daily, but I'm just trying to stretch, and massage, and relax my way through them. I haven't had a cluster hit yet, and that is VERY encouraging.
I am at my heaviest weight again, though (219), so that's a bit ugh-worthy. I might go on Jenny Craig or something. I dunno. My goal isn't to be the perfect, skinny chick. My goal is to be healthy and happy. But every once in a while, I think back to the days when I was a skinny chick and remember how great it was. I mean, I was an emotional mess, but I looked so pretty! :/
I'm getting there, I think. I'll figure this whole "me" thing out eventually. But for now, I think I'll just be proud of the steps I'm taking, and leave it at that.